Wisdom On ... Getting Along with Parents (Wisdom Series, Band 36) - Softcover

Matlock, Mark

Softcover

ISBN 10: 0310279291 ISBN 13: 9780310279297

Verlag: Study Resources, 2008

Inhaltsangabe

Wisdom On…Getting Along with Parents can help you understand both sides a little better and improve your relationship. This book is about giving you insight and understanding into the dynamics of your relationship with your parents, and helping you learn to use wisdom when you interact with them. You’ll walk away from this book with a whole new perspective on the relationship you have with your parents, and how to have an even better one.

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Über die Autorin bzw. den Autor

Mark Matlock has been working with youth pastors, students, and parents for more than two decades. He’s the Executive director of Youth Specialties and founder of WisdomWorks Ministries and PlanetWisdom. He’s the author of several books including The Wisdom On series, Living a Life That Matters, Don’t Buy the Lie, and Raising Wise Children. Mark lives in Texas with his wife, Jade, and their two teenage children.

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Wisdom On…Getting Along with Parents can help you understand both sides a little better and improve your relationship. This book is about giving you insight and understanding into the dynamics of your relationship with your parents, and helping you learn to use wisdom when you interact with them. You'll walk away from this book with a whole new perspective on the relationship you have with your parents, and how to have an even better one.

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Wisdom On ... Getting Along with Parents

By Mark Matlock

Zondervan

Copyright © 2008 Mark Matlock
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-0-310-27929-7

Contents

CHAPTER 1: WISDOM ON PARENTS? REALLY?.....................................9CHAPTER 2: IMAGINE THAT!..................................................21CHAPTER 3: WHAT GOD TELLS YOUR PARENTS TO DO..............................33CHAPTER 4: WHAT GOD TELLS KIDS TO DO......................................51CHAPTER 5: WISE AND STUBBORN HONOR........................................63CHAPTER 6: INTERVIEWING YOUR PARENTS......................................77CHAPTER 7: WHY PARENTS AND TEENAGERS FIGHT................................85CHAPTER 8: TRUE INDEPENDENCE..............................................97CHAPTER 9: THE FINE ART OF PARENTAL NEGOTIATION...........................107CHAPTER 10: MINISTER TO MY PARENTS?.......................................121CHAPTER 11: WRITE A RELATIONSHIP LETTER TO MY PARENTS.....................129CHAPTER 12: CASE STUDIES..................................................133CHAPTER 13: FINAL NOTE: WHEN PARENTS ARE ABUSIVE..........................139

Chapter One

WISDOM ON PARENTS? REALLY?

My dad and I had been working outside all Saturday morning. My father loves to prune trees and bushes, and on our three acres there were plenty of trees and bushes to clip.

On this particular Saturday morning, I'd been recruited to help my dad-whether I liked it or not. My job was to deliver wheelbarrow after wheelbarrow full of clippings to the dumpster. The piles seemed endless to me. And my father had no intention of stopping. Needless to say, I was less than thrilled about spending my Saturday doing yard work.

When the dumpster was full, I assumed we were done for the day. So when my dad moved on to another tree, my blood started to boil.

"Let's take a break for a moment," my father finally suggested. As we sat in the shade, my dad started giving me a hard time about my attitude. He knew I wasn't happy, but his feeble attempts to cheer me up only fueled my frustration. Then something bad happened.

My dad started mimicking my pouting face, and I decided I'd had enough. In the heat of the moment, I did something I'd never done before-and have never done since. I punched my father-right in the chest.

He was stunned. I was stunned. Hitting was unacceptable in my family. Where had my violent outburst come from? I didn't pause to wonder. Instead, I started running. And my dad started running after me.

My dad hadn't chased me since I was in elementary school, but I remembered that I'd never been able to get away from him. He always caught me. But things had changed since then. Now I was 15 years old, and my dad was also much older. And I was on the track and field team at my high school.

I sprinted across our three acres to a corner of the property furthest from our house. I didn't look back because I was afraid that if I did, I'd see my dad's arm reaching out to grab me. But when I got to the fence at the back of the property, I had no choice. I was out of options. So I turned around to find that my dad was ... not even close to me.

He was about an acre away, hunched over, and huffing and puffing. I had outrun my father.

Despite the seriousness of the situation, I couldn't help smiling. I'd beaten my dad! All my life, he'd won every competition we'd ever had. Board games, tennis, basketball-he beat me at everything. Finally, though, the tables had turned. I'd beaten him at something.

My dad stood up, smiled at me, and waved as I did a little victory dance. And that made me reconsider my situation. Why had my dad smiled at me? Why did he walk back to the house?

I sat down on a clump of grass and reviewed my circumstances. I had won; he had lost. But I was sitting alone in the field, and he was in the house! I knew at some point I was going to have to face him. I couldn't stay in the field all day ... or could I?

My dad had smiled because he knew I'd have to return home eventually. And then I'd have to deal with the consequences of my actions. I learned the hard way that in a battle between parent and kid, there's rarely a clear-cut winner. I hope I can offer you some chunks of wisdom to help you in your relationship with your parents.

As I travel around the country and speak to students in person-as well as online-I hear a lot of talk about parents. And the things I hear aren't all that different from the things my friends and I said about our parents.

"I love my parents, but ..."

"They just don't understand me."

"They think I'm still a kid."

"They don't get what it's like to be a kid these days."

"I can't stand how they try to control everything I do."

"Why don't they listen to what I say?"

"Why can't they understand that I just want to be left alone?"

"Why do they have to make such a big deal out of everything?"

"What if they're wrong?"

At some point most students will have to deal with tough times in their relationships with their parents. And when a serious conflict occurs, it can have a huge impact on your life. It can affect every other relationship you have. It can cause you to doubt yourself. It can make you question everything you thought you could take for granted. Like it or not, the way you deal with your parents will become a cornerstone of the rest of your life.

For all of its importance, though, I've found that students aren't very interested in hearing about how to get along with their parents. They'd much rather hear God's wisdom regarding sex and dating, or movies and music, or making money.

Why is there so little interest in an issue as important or vital as your first-and probably longest-lasting-relationship? For one thing, most students believe they're doing just fine with their moms and dads, thank you very much. Recent surveys reveal that teenagers and parents are pretty happy together, for the most part. Despite the fact that most students will go through a rough time with the 'rents, the majority say they're in an okay place at any given moment. So why talk about fixing what seemingly isn't broken? For starters, being "okay" isn't always the same thing as living wisely in relation to our parents-but we'll cover more on that later.

On the other side of the coin, many students who are currently on the outs with Mom and Dad don't want to hear me talk about God's wisdom on the issue because they're convinced they already know what I'm going to say: "Your parents are right. You're wrong. So be quiet and do what they say." Actually, that's not what I say-but there will be more on that subject a little later as well.

Please understand me: This book is NOT about getting you to fall in line and be a good little soldier in your parents' army. It's NOT about trying to fix your behavior issues at home. It's NOT about convincing you that your parents are right about everything. It's NOT about making you believe it's all your problem if you have an issue with your folks.

Like all the other books in the Wisdom On ... series, this one is about finding a life that matters by learning to live wisely. If you've read any of those other books (on sex and dating, media, money, and other topics), then you know I'm passionate about God's wisdom. You know wisdom doesn't just mean, "Do whatever the Bible says, and you'll be okay." That's true to a point, but wisdom involves much more than mindless rule-following.

We live in a time when people have more access to information than at any...

Details zur Ausgabe

• Verlag: Study Resources
• Erscheinungsdatum: 2008
• Sprache: Englisch
• ISBN 10: 0310279291
• ISBN 13: 9780310279297
• Einband: Taschenbuch
• Anzahl der Seiten: 143
• Kontakt zum Hersteller: preigu GmbH & Co. KG; mail@preigu.de; ; Lengericher Landstr. 19; Osnabrück; Niedersachsen; 49078; Deutschland