A Christian parents’ guide to beginning open and honest discussions about homosexuality
Christian parents need to be prepared to answer the myriad challenges teens might hear in today’s increasingly pro homosexual culture. “Why shouldn’t gays get married?” “Who says gay sex is wrong?” “Does the Bible actually say there’s anything wrong with homosexuality?” “Don’t you care that kids are being bullied just for being themselves?”
To start the discussion, Gilson provides a brief history of the issues beginning with the sexual revolution of the 1960s. He explains how and why cultural attitudes have reversed on this subject in such a short timespan, leaving Christians scrambling for answers.
This is perhaps the most complicated and contentious issue Christians face in today’s culture. Most churches are poorly equipped to handle it; parents are even less prepared. The good news is that parents need not have pat answers ready before they dive into conversations with their teens and preteens on this difficult topic. Learning together—parents struggling through these issues alongside their kids and leading them to biblical answers— has relational benefits.
Answers are important, though, so manageable, nontechnical answers to common questions surrounding this issue are provided, as well as a guide to further resources.
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Tom Gilson is the Vice President for Strategic Services for the Ratio Christi Student Apologetics Alliance. He is the monthly Worldview and You columnist at BreakPoint, and has written articles for Discipleship Journal, Touchstone Magazine, and Salvo. He blogs at Thinking Christian and The Point. He enjoys canoeing, sailing, and long walks in the woods. He lives with wife Sara and their two college-aged children in Lebanon, Ohio.
Foreword by Sean McDowell, 11,
Preface, 13,
1. Introduction, 17,
Part One: Essential Background,
2. How Did We Get Here?, 27,
3. What Marriage Is, 34,
4. Marriage and Morality in the Bible, 44,
Part Two: Navigating the Rocky Relationships,
5. Relating in Truth, Love, and Strength, 55,
6. Talking with Your Teen About Tough Questions: Basic Principles, 66,
7. Relating to Friends, 77,
8. Relating to Teachers, Administrators, and Professors, 85,
Part Three: Practical Help in Handling the Challenges,
Group A: Regarding Intolerance and Hate,
Group B: Regarding Social Policy,
Group C: Regarding God and the Bible,
Afterword, 187,
A Vision for Marriage in Our Culture: Ten Essentials, 189,
Resource Guide, 193,
Introduction
Bigot. Hater. Intolerant. Christian.
Christians were rarely labeled that way when I was growing up. We sure are today. The gay marriage movement has branded Christianity with that image, they've branded you and me with it, and, worst of all, they've stuck those labels on our Christian sons and daughters. To be a committed, believing Christian in today's world, especially the world our youth live in, is to be considered an intolerant bigot.
On television, in the classrooms, in political debates, in music and film, and all over the Internet, the message is relentlessly repeated: If you're a Christian, you're a hater. Christian young people have too few places of refuge from that cutting criticism. They can't help wondering, If that's what it means to be a Christian, do I want it?
Many teens answer that question with a no. Although survey results differ in their details, all researchers agree that at least half of all youth brought up in Christian homes will walk away from the faith when they leave home for college or career. Some studies indicate that as many as three-quarters of Christian youth abandon the faith. These are our children. They're teens who come out of strong evangelical homes and churches. They could be your children.
My wife and I have a twenty-four-year-old son and a twenty-year-old daughter. They used to ask us for help with their homework. They asked us about math or geography or science — questions they were expecting to face on tests at school. There was another test they faced regularly, though it never showed up in a class syllabus or agenda. Every student in public school faces this test at least weekly, and every student who listens to music, watches TV or films, or surfs the Internet does, too. This test has items like,
Why can't gays get married?
Who says gay sex is wrong?
I heard someone say the Bible doesn't really teach there's anything wrong with homosexuality.
What about the two men sharing the house down the street? They're great people. I don't see anything wrong with them — doesn't their relationship count, too?
And on it goes. If you haven't heard your teens asking questions like these, it isn't because they're not being tested on them. On Facebook and on film, on the school bus and in the lunchroom, these challenges are unavoidable.
The Turning of the Tide
Can you believe how quickly the world has changed? Today's teens face moral pressures that never entered our minds, and they're navigating relationship c
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