As the population grows and technology advances, the world gets smaller and smaller. Earth is no longer a vast metropolis; today, it is a tiny village. As the Earth shrinks, confusion grows. We are surrounded by what others say and do. We are told what to feel, what to think, and what to say; our identities disappear until "identity" loses meaning. But without identity, our lives also lose meaning. Outgrowing Fear gives you that identity back. Told as narrative, a story about many becomes a story about you. Why are you the way you are? Amidst the layers of your personality exist the answers. This is a step-by-step journey to finally realizing your true self-without fear, without doubt, and without disharmony. There is nothing more terrifying than looking at ourselves objectively ... and nothing more necessary. The characters in this book are seeking identity through religion and spirituality. Through their difficult searches, you, too, may find your answers. It is time to let the real discussion begin within you. At last, face the unknown courageously, and achieve inner and outer harmony through the discovery of your identity.
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1. The Search Begins......................................12. Why I Belong...........................................273. Question That, Never Question This.....................394. Love In Question.......................................645. One Shot, No Second Chances............................816. Holier Than Thou.......................................1057. My Way or the High Way.................................1158. Pandemic Spread........................................1289. Road To Heaven Paved With Sex..........................15810. Miscellaneous.........................................17411. Man as Man............................................19612. Reflection............................................227
He sat in his favorite chair out in the open as always, gazing at the stars that adorned the sky, wondering how the clouds broke and then merged into another. Sometimes a small patch of cloud would break away from the mother cloud and float, seemingly without direction on its own, maybe it was trying to find itself and its place in this vast universe, detaching from the collective consciousness. Also, he could form a picture of anything in the clouds and his thoughts and imagination would take to the heavens and beyond, developing wings and flying off, to where? Your guess would be as good as his. But one thing was certain, his thoughts were limitless. 'How did we get here? What is my purpose here? Is everything or anything real? Is there a beginning and will there be an end? What does it mean to be alive? What does it mean to die?'
Sometimes these questions pounded his brain-his mind, like waves hit the shore, relentlessly and endlessly, and sometimes frighteningly. Few times things made partial sense, but most of the times they were totally nonsense. But deep inside him somewhere he knew he might not just have all the answers - maybe that was the way it was meant to be, then by whom and why? Why the mysteries?
Regardless of everything that went on in this man, he loved to celebrate life. Marveled at how the different and colorful species interacted with one another. The eternal conflict in nature - eat or be eaten; life depending on life for continued existence, the balance of a ball in space, the stars, and the people that used the stars to foretell the future of man, the ever nurturing part of Mother Nature and the ugly side, a world of opposites; yin and yang. But nevertheless, a beautiful place, and he cherished it with all the dangers, fears or what have you that went along with it. One of Louis Armstrong songs, what a wonderful world, popped up in his head and he smiled. So, wherever his thoughts took him, he was glad to be part of this world; glad to be part of the love and the pain. But the nagging question never went away. 'How did I get here?' He didn't have a clue! Was it ever possible not to be a man, to contemplate nonexistence would be scary.
To that question it seemed everybody was willing to provide him a sure answer. He should look no further. But who was he going to believe and based on what? There were countless answers to one question!
Suddenly his thought was interrupted again. "Honey, honey" cried a woman's voice. "They've started another senseless fight, and the children, the elderly and the weak are going to pay the price, not forgetting raping the women - it comes with the package." She was pretty upset at the things man did to man in the name of one thing or another.
He ran to her and put his arm around her shoulders. "Everything will be alright." He said without believing a word of it himself. She was no dunce, either. It was just the right thing to say at the moment.
One of his thoughts sped back into his consciousness like a bullet train. Since time immemorial man had been at man's throat. Sometimes it could be perplexing trying to understand man. He was like a universe within a universe. Nature and the vastness of space could be mission impossible, but man, maybe he could dissect him, knock some sense into that thick skull, or rather, see how this well-oiled-machine worked. And no thanks to all the professors of theology trying to rationalize religion and man...and all the brain-scanning-scientists, too.
"Honey, just change the channel," he said, reaching for the remote. "Don't let it ruin our evening again." Choosing his words calmly and at the same time reaching even closer to her body.
Changing the channel was not changing the situation on the ground. What if this could be happening where he lived? What if? What if? But, whatever what if? Tonight he would brush that aside for later.
He held his wife closer and kissed her passionately on every part of her body. He could sense the frustration dissipating and gradually being replaced by something warm and cozy. Sweet sensation was flowing like an electric current from him to her and vice versa. "I'd like to rip your gown off right now, right here and make love to you like never before," he said in a soft and deep sexy voice. She always loved a little naughty talk.
"Hmm ... what's stopping you?" She replied eagerly, already weakening at the knees. She started shedding her night gown, revealing her smooth olive skin, at the same time tilting her head back while removing the pin that held her long, jet black hair so it cascaded on her shoulders. She gave a faint sound and stared at him with her brown eyes as if she didn't know what would come next. She wrapped one of her long legs (a weakness for him) around him like a rescued girl holding on for dear life. She was only a couple of inches shorter, anyway. No one would have guessed she was in her late twenties. She still had her slim and well proportioned figure, probably because she ate right most of the time and was active in sports, just like she did in college, or it could be that nature was kind to her body.
They made love again and again, on the floor, on the dresser, every conceivable and inconvenient place in the room, however. The chemistry was still hot after eight years.
"Good night," he said, still holding her from the back as they tried to fall asleep together. "Sweet dreams, honey ... Oh, what time do you want me to wake you up tomorrow? Remember your big project tomorrow, huh?" She asked in a tired but satisfied voice.
"I thought I just did it." He smiled, kissing the nape of her neck.
"Ah ... yes dear, wake me up at six-ish. Thanks."
He let go of her and turned to his side of the bed. He couldn't sleep holding anyone, even with the most beautiful woman by his side. He didn't know why, he just couldn't, no matter how hard he tried and he did try. He would like to believe he still made passionate love as he did when he first discovered the beauty of making love, now that he was in his mid thirties. Whoever said sex would slow down after a while didn't know what he was saying. His favorite food still tasted the same, yummy. Why not sex, with the love of your life.
In his mind he had traveled to every part of the world and the universe, tasted every food, cherished everywoman, and argued every point or discussion, whatever you would like to call it. He had seen the ugliest side of man and the amazing spirit of oneness that couldn't be matched by the crudest nature of man. With all his food tasting and contesting every single point and the...
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