Modern Infidel: Filet of Soul: New and Reimagined Edition - Softcover

Risk, R. Thomas Thomas

Softcover

ISBN 10: 1496900103 ISBN 13: 9781496900104

Verlag: AuthorHouse, 2014

Inhaltsangabe

Stalked by a hitman for a heinous crime of which he was acquitted, a church pastor suffers waking nightmares about a dysfunctional divine family, a grim reaper which bears a striking resemblance to Johnny Cash, four riderless horses and a looming apocalypse. Meanwhile, society is in turmoil. Federal laws have disarmed honest citizens while freeing convicted murderers. Runaway taxation has driven the everyday economy underground. Congressional assent to a United Nations treaty facilitates the deadliest terrorist attack since 9/11/01. As the Presidential election nears, an irresistible urge to be truthful seizes the incumbent and her Republican opponent. The incumbent’s revelation about systemic voter fraud triggers reforms which result in a landslide victory for the third-party underdog. Ironically, not a single voter remembers selecting the spoiler at the ballot box. Predator and prey finally meet at a funeral, but the ceremony is hijacked by General George Patton. After performing a slapstick resurrection and setting humanity straight on a few things, Patton solves the political mystery by explaining the evolutionary leap which has begun to expand human consciousness. The newly aware congregants proceed to reinvent the United States of America envisioned by its founders.

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Über die Autorin bzw. den Autor

Author of the groundbreaking nonfiction book Where We Find Ourselves: Portrait of a Modern Infidel, R. Thomas Risk storms onto the fiction scene with Modern Infidel: Filet of Soul, a gripping story of individual triumph over despotism and bigotry. His motley cast of endearing characters gore the most sacred of cattle - among them racism, federal governance and censorship - as they redefine independence and resurrect the time-honored building blocks of a free and fair society. Join Risk on his relentless rampage against empty tradition and all things socialist at ModernInfidel.com.

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Modern Infidel: Filet of Soul

A Novel

By R. Thomas Risk

AuthorHouse LLC

Copyright © 2014 R. Thomas Risk
All rights reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-4969-0010-4

Contents

Dedication, v, 
Acknowledgments, vi, 
Prefatory Note, vii, 
Overture – Don't Feed the Cannibals, 1, 
Public Service Announcement, 6, 
1. Cosmic Cellmates, 7, 
Public Service Announcement, 21, 
2. Pigtail Diplomacy, 22, 
Public Service Announcement, 27, 
3. United States of Appeasement – Side One, 28, 
Public Service Announcement, 46, 
4. United States of Appeasement – Flipside, 47, 
Public Service Announcement, 55, 
5. The Delicate Politics of Homicide, 56, 
Public Service Announcement, 65, 
6. Saviour Syndrome, 66, 
Public Service Announcement, 81, 
7. Regaining Unconsciousness, 82, 
Public Service Announcement, 93, 
8. Shoats Aloft, 94, 
Public Service Announcement, 115, 
9. Shoestring Epiphany, 116, 
Public Service Announcement, 129, 
10. Ante Up, 130, 
Public Service Announcement, 136, 
11. Generation Gaffe, 137, 
Public Service Announcement, 154, 
12. Psycho Soufflé, 155, 
Public Service Announcement, 166, 
13. Relief Denied Even to Prayer, 167, 
Public Service Announcement, 179, 
14. That Which Transcends, 180, 
Public Service Announcement, 191, 
15. For the Love of Melissa, 192, 
Public Service Announcement, 207, 
16. Color Human, 208, 
Public Service Announcement, 214, 
17. Home the Hard Way, 215, 
Public Service Announcement, 251, 
18. Petting Zoo Voodoo, 252, 
Public Service Announcement, 277, 
19. Crass from the Past, 278, 
The First Female President's Last Public Comment, 297, 
20. The Taunted Beast Stirs, 298, 
Dying Gasp of the Federal Leviathan, 312, 
Finale – Leaving Catatonia, 313, 
Shameless Wrapup, 320, 

CHAPTER 1

Cosmic Cellmates

October 14, 2020

"God save us from the goddamned puritans."

Freddie can no more see the face of the smartly dressed passerby who uttered this paradox than he can grasp its simple irony. Nor does he attach any significance to the bulky cigar the man brandishes as he talks to the guards at the gated end of the alley. Freddie cares for nothing beyond the fact that this is the last time a prison van will carry him from a penitentiary to the side entrance of a downtown courthouse. This is the last time he will suffer the indignity of having to wear ill fitting jumpsuits and being trussed up in chains like a roasting hog before he can venture beyond the razor wire, the last time he'll be ordered to duck his head through the doorway to that filthy elevator, the last time he'll have to be respectful to that deputy Sheriff who stands too close and smells like toe-jam. After ... well, more days than he can count, this is the last time Freddie will have to stand next to that wormy public defender who shakes hands like a twink.

"Next on the docket?"

This is not the same judge who sentenced Freddie. But he looks every bit as angry at being saddled with his present task.

"State v. Freddie Herzog." The judge peers over his granny-glasses at Freddie in patent distaste, "aka Slinky Sam," then drops his gaze again to the slip of paper his clerk just passed to him. "On August 7, 2006, Mr. Herzog ... I have a date of offense but no offense. What did this man do? Where is his file?"

The bailiff whispers in the judge's ear.

"Do you mean to tell me the court clerk has had this docket for two weeks but can't do me the simple courtesy of producing the man's file?"

The judge yanks his glasses off and gestures with his coffee cup.

"Attorneys approach."

The prosecutor scurries to the bench, Freddie's effeminate defender close on his heels.

"Gentlemen, all I have on this guy is a five-by-eight slip of paper from the Sheriff. I'm trying to make a record here. What crime did this man commit?"

The attorneys trade blank glances, then the prosecutor frantically thumbs through a legal pad and says something inaudible to the judge.

"Well, I have to tell the both of you, this is one hell of a way to start the day. Do we even know the man I am about to cut loose is the same man the jury sent up? Do I look illiterate to you? Of course the name on the Sheriff's inventory matches the one on the federal writ. But it's the surname Herzog that takes me aback. The man sitting at your table in chains is most definitely of Latin descent. How can I be so sure? Look at my nameplate, genius. I think I'm qualified to assess whether or not this man is a Latino. Neither of you brought a file? Enough, I'm going to get to the bottom of this right now. Step away."

As the attorneys saunter back to their respective tables, the judge stretches his neck and drums the bench with an impatient ink pen.

"Will the prisoner please stand?"

At the nod of his epicene mouthpiece, Freddie climbs upright.

"Sir, is your name Freddie Herzog?"

"Yes, that it is, your honor."

"For what infraction are you serving time?"

"Man, I don't know nothing about Algeria."

"Algeria?"

"That math class with them infractions and rations and whatnot."

"What is your mother's maiden name?"

"Mary Magdalena Areces Galaviz, your honor. I ain't seen her since ..."

"Your father?"

"Well, Judge, I don't think she know. But she got a marryin' license say Mary Magdalena Areces Galaviz Herzog, so I guess mi padre be a Hebe."

Freddie's laughter finds no purchase. Hearing the same remonstrative sputter from his attorney that his mother used to make, he does his best to be conciliatory. "And, uh, I mean that with all dual aspect, your honor." A cadaverous hand pulls him down to ear level as his effete representative whispers frantically. "Sorry, your honor, my mouth over here say that's dual respect. Yeah, with all dual respect."

"That's enough, Mr. Herzog."

"Sure, Judge. I'm just saying –"

The judge's gavel rattles the courtroom like a gunshot.

"Shut your mouth, Mr. Herzog. No, no, keep standing; just do so quietly. Now then. For whatever crime of which you were indicted, on December 18, 2009 a jury of your peers handed down a sentence ... which was obviously far longer than your actual tenure in our justice system's various facilities; hence, the endearing catchphrase early release. Pursuant to the federal Criminal Rehabilitation and Reform Act, that sentence was commuted to time served. You are free, sir, to reenter society without restriction. The deputy will now take you to processing, where you will be provided with a new suit of clothes, a prepaid cell phone with five thousand minutes of talk time and, because what little information I have indicates you were on death row, a debit card with a balance of $10,000 to compensate you for the cruel and unusual punishment the State has inflicted upon you."

Less than one hour later (the fastest he has ever been processed), Freddie smoothes the coat sleeve of the hand-tailored worsted wool suit for which he was fitted last Friday. Though he always hated wearing ties, he figures he can find an alternative use for this one, so he tucks it securely into his pocket. With one last look in the mirror, Freddie nods to the attendant who then summons the deputies under whose escort Freddie will, for the first time in his thirty-four years of life, walk out the front door of a courthouse.

No sooner...

Details zur Ausgabe

• Verlag: AuthorHouse
• Erscheinungsdatum: 2014
• Sprache: Englisch
• ISBN 10: 1496900103
• ISBN 13: 9781496900104
• Einband: Taschenbuch
• Anzahl der Seiten: 234
• Kontakt zum Hersteller: Nicht verfügbar
• Verantwortliche Person: gpsr@libri.de; gpsr@libri.de; ; Friedensallee 273; Hamburg; 22763; Deutschland