The Other Side of Healing: Surviving Life Trauma . . . Make the Choice to Survive and Thrive . . . Never Give Up . . . Don’t Let Your Light Go Out - Softcover

Fogler, Bonnie

Softcover

ISBN 10: 1504394607 ISBN 13: 9781504394604

Verlag: BalboaPress, 2018

Inhaltsangabe

When life challenges you and you feel hopeless with no way out, do not give up. Whether you are plagued by chronic illness, grief, betrayal, divorce, anger, resentment, or some other equally destructive situation, there are ways to pull yourself up, not only to survive but to thrive. Say goodbye to depression, anger, and resentment, and learn emotional survival techniques that will change your thoughts and actions to work for you and bring happiness into your life. It is amazing to learn that there are techniques to make this happen and that they are not that difficult to do. All you need is hope and determination to move forward out of your life trauma, and follow the outlined steps in the book to start on your healing journey.

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Über die Autorin bzw. den Autor

Bonnie Fogler was born and grew up in Newark, NJ. She earned a Bachelor of Arts Degree from Kean University majoring in Psychology and worked in a management position in the insurance industry for many years. She resides in a suburb in NJ with her husband, Joe, and keeps busy with family, friends and activities and attends monthly workshops in life choices and spirituality as well as "on line" courses to keep learning.

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The Other Side of Healing

Surviving Life Trauma ... Make the Choice to Survive and Thrive ... Never Give Up ... Don't Let Your Light Go Out

By Bonnie Fogler

Balboa Press

Copyright © 2018 Bonnie Fogler
All rights reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-5043-9460-4

Contents

Introduction, ix, 
Chapter 1 My Story, 1, 
Chapter 2 Body, 7, 
Chapter 3 Mind, 33, 
Chapter 4 Spirit, 63, 
Chapter 5 Today, 101, 
References, 103, 

CHAPTER 1

My Story

Find Your Fire

In July 2009, I was in intensive care at a hospital. I was in a coma and very close to death. I was experiencing liver failure, had sepsis (bacterial blood infection), hepatic encephalopathy (toxins in the blood that reached my brain because my liver wasn't filtering them), high ammonia count in my blood, pneumonia, and so many things, I can't remember all of them. My skin was yellow (some said orange), my blood pressure was 70/50, and I needed immediate surgery because I was vomiting blood clots. I also desperately needed a liver transplant to stay alive, but even if there was an available liver, I couldn't be moved to University Hospital, where they did liver transplants in New Jersey. My family was told I wouldn't survive the transfer. In fact, I could have easily died right where I was. I was deteriorating at a rapid pace.

So, how did I get to that point?

I entered this world and lived my young life as a very healthy and active person. I participated in sports, including track and field, exercise, and gymnastics as a child and I had very high energy. I loved the people and friends I made doing these activities and was happy participating in physical activity. As a young adult, I married, had two wonderful daughters, worked full-time, and completed a bachelor's degree in psychology while going to night classes. I guess I spread myself a bit thin during that time, but I had the energy and determination to complete everything I needed or wanted to do.

Then something strange happened to my vitality and health. It was so sudden and shocking that I didn't know what hit me. I woke up one morning for work and could barely get out of bed. I was sick, sore, and more fatigued than I had ever felt in my life. Thinking I had the flu or a virus, I took it easy and rested, but the illness didn't go away. I did my best to go back to my regular routine, but my energy was so low, life was very difficult. This went on, and I tried getting more sleep, making sure I ate well. I did everything I could think of to restore my health.

I woke up exhausted every morning after a good night's sleep and just walked around tired all the time. I fought to stay awake and alert at my desk at work. I found a functioning new normal and managed to get my work done but pretty much collapsed when I got home. I used all my energy at my job as long as I could, but at some point, I was forced to go on disability. That step was devastating to me, because I enjoyed my career and the people I worked with.

So, of course, I saw a doctor, and this phase of life turned into many years of specialists, tests, medicines, referrals, and a medical merry-go-round nightmare. At the end of it, I didn't feel any better, and no one could pinpoint what was causing all my distress and disability. I will later go into this situation in more detail, only because it may be helpful to anyone suffering with chronic illness to see that he or she isn't crazy and that the medical community sometimes doesn't really understand what their patients are going through emotionally.

The doctors tried, but I wasn't a textbook case. They found many irregularities but nothing to explain the cause; therefore there was no cure.

Running on Empty

First, I will describe the pain and frustration of anyone in this circumstance. I reached a point that the slightest activity was a huge effort. Climbing stairs felt like a trip up Mount Everest, and walking any farther than my house to my driveway left me out of breath. I had to stop in the middle of a staircase because I couldn't make it up a full flight of stairs without having trouble breathing. If I had to go shopping, I parked in a handicapped space and barely got to the front door of the store. I had to keep resting along the way and walk very slowly. If I had to go to a store at the other end of the mall, I had to return to my car and drive to the other end, because there was no way I could walk that far. This also required a rest in my car for a while before going into the new store. I could fall asleep anywhere and anytime. My energy was so low.

Eventually making myself something to eat or taking a shower and washing my hair required so much of my energy that I had to learn energy management. If I had to go out somewhere, even for medical appointments, I made sure I didn't schedule anything the day before and after. I showered at night so I could go to bed afterward, because doing it in the morning left me no energy to go out afterward. I drove short distances and visited or did errands, but I was always pushing myself to my limits.

I somehow felt or knew that if I gave in to this illness I would never come out of it, so I fought like hell even when all I wanted to do was rest or sleep. I was even careful to keep myself looking as good as possible in my dress, hygiene, hair, and nails, because I was fighting to keep some normalcy in my life.

Everything in my body seemed to be affected, including my hair, skin, energy, mood, and then my weight. Suddenly, I started to gain weight after a life of being naturally thin. My abdomen became distended, and I was gaining a few pounds a week. I panicked, went to a diet doctor, and went on a strict diet, using special food and liquid drinks for some meals. But the weight continued piling on to the tune of about fifty pounds, and then it finally stopped. I continued with all kinds of weight-loss diets but those pounds stuck to me like glue no matter what I did. Eventually, it finally stopped and my weight stayed the same, whether I dieted or ate regularly. It was a mystery even the diet specialist I saw couldn't explain. In addition, while all this was happening, I had low-grade fevers daily for years.

In the beginning I talked to others about how I felt, because I was so confused and frustrated, and it struck me that for the first time, I couldn't control my life and health. Later, I stopped talking about my illness because I felt like all my family and friends had heard enough and I didn't want to be depressing to be with. I tried to look and act as normal as possible no matter how badly I felt. I got up every morning (some mornings were 11:00AM), got dressed, and went downstairs to my living area, even if I had to spend a good part of the day resting in a lounge chair. I refused to stay in bed. Of course, this reality was depressing, but I wouldn't let myself go there. When it all became too overwhelming, I let myself feel some self-pity but gave it a time limit of three days. I then forced myself to get back up and keep going. It wasn't an easy task at first and I will explain how I did it in my Mind chapter.

Looking back, I see that I was blessed in having natural drive and determination to get better, and these really helped me find my way. I must give credit to my parents, who promoted confidence and taught us not to give up and always fight for ourselves. I read everything I could get my hands on that even remotely sounded like my symptoms. I began to learn little pieces I would eventually put together. I joined a group called "Chronic Fatigue Syndrome"...

Details zur Ausgabe

• Verlag: BalboaPress
• Erscheinungsdatum: 2018
• Sprache: Englisch
• ISBN 10: 1504394607
• ISBN 13: 9781504394604
• Einband: Taschenbuch
• Anzahl der Seiten: 118
• Kontakt zum Hersteller: Nicht verfügbar
• Verantwortliche Person: gpsr@libri.de; gpsr@libri.de; ; Friedensallee 273; Hamburg; 22763; Deutschland