Hive: The Simple Guide to Multigenerational Living - Softcover

Cini, Lisa M.

Softcover

ISBN 10: 1532020635 ISBN 13: 9781532020636

Verlag: iUniverse, 2017

Inhaltsangabe

"This is not just a book, it’s a MOVEMENT. Lisa did not choose to write Hive, Hive chose her." —Kute Blackson, transformational teacher and bestselling author of You.Are.The.One. Four generations live under one roof in Columbus, Ohio, and they’ve figure out to make it work: dividing responsibilities and chores, re-designing some physical spaces for privacy, and reconfiguring others into common areas for all to gather and enjoy living together. This tale of heartache, heroism, and hope is one family’s multi generational social experiment, which encompasses kids in their teens, parents in their forties, grandparents in their seventies, and a ninety-plus year-old great-grandmother. Together, as they navigate the joys and challenges that come with aging in America, they’re also answering the question, "How does family help you thrive at home when you’re old?" An Alzheimer’s/dementia diagnosis adds a layer of complexity, yet the family resolves to keep their eldest at home for as long as she’s happy, safe and engaged in life. The younger generation learns much from their elders, and the elders from their children. While mastering the use of technology and new family systems, they’re also mastering the use of humor, tolerance, and patience. Ultimately, that’s what makes this four-generation experiment a success. Practical design advice and clear-eyed strategies are mixed with personal tips and observations, making it easy to see how anyone can transform their home in into their own multi-generational living situation. Her stories are honest, both funny and poignant. The family’s fiascos are counterbalanced by their many successes, the greatest one being that as individuals and as a family, they continue to thrive.

Über diesen Titel

Über die Autorin bzw. den Autor

Lisa M. Cini is known as the leading Alzheimer's and long-term care design expert in the United States and has been widely recognized for her contributions in the field. Lisa continues to design award-winning spaces for seniors as Founder and CEO of Mosaic Design Studio, as well as design for the hospitality industry. Her clients have included the National Hockey League, the United States military, Brio Bravo restaurants, PGA Tour Country Clubs, and various hotels. Cini is the author of The Future is Here: Senior Living Reimagined, and Hive: The Simple Guide to Multigenerational Living, How our Family Makes It Work. Lisa M. Cini has received over 37 awards, including 16 ASID Design awards and a Distinguished Service Medal for Outstanding Meritorious Service by the Governor of Indiana. A sought-after speaker, Lisa has been featured on radio and CNN, CBS, FOX, and NBC. She also appeared on Today in America with Terry Bradshaw and is quoted frequently in The New York Times. Connect with her at LisaMCini.com.

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Hive

The Simple Guide to Multigenerational Living

By Lisa M. Cini

iUniverse

Copyright © 2017 Lisa M. Cini
All rights reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-5320-2063-6

Contents

Dedication, vii, 
Introduction: The Hive, ix, 
Parkview, 
Chapter 1 Who We Are, 1, 
Chapter 2 The Hive, 11, 
Chapter 3 Parkview, 15, 
Chapter 4 My Grandma: Gerline Elizabeth Fink Lilly, 21, 
Chapter 5 Grandma's Apartment Suite, 25, 
Chapter 6 Grandma's Living Room, 35, 
Chapter 7 Grandma's Bedroom, 43, 
Chapter 8 Grandma's Bathroom, 49, 
Chapter 9 Grandma's Circuit, 59, 
Chapter 10 The Community Living Room, 63, 
Chapter 11 The Dining Room, 69, 
Chapter 12 The Kitchen, 75, 
Chapter 13 Community Family Room, 83, 
Chapter 14 The Parents' Bedroom, 89, 
How to Stay Alive in The Hive, 
Chapter 15 Coming Out of the Closet, 95, 
Chapter 16 Watching For Clues, 103, 
Chapter 17 Added Value, 105, 
Chapter 18 Boundaries, 109, 
Chapter 19 Grandma's Song, 113, 
Chapter 20 "Just in Case", 117, 
Chapter 21 Big Brother Is Watching, 121, 
Chapter 22 Failed Experiment, 125, 
Chapter 23 Royal Flush, 129, 
Chapter 24 Safety First, 135, 
Chapter 25 Always a Lady, 139, 
Field Notes, 
Chapter 26 The Bees, 143, 
Chapter 27 Two Kinds of Giving, 147, 
Chapter 28 Grandma as Weather Girl, 151, 
Chapter 29 The Rise of a Sneaky Grandma, 155, 
Chapter 30 Who Rescued Who?, 159, 
Chapter 31 Not In My House, 163, 
Chapter 32 The Lunch Bunch, 167, 
Chapter 33 Our Boarders, 171, 
Chapter 34 "God, Why Not Her?", 177, 
Chapter 35 Saying Goodbye, 183, 
Chapter 36 Until We Meet, 185, 
Bonus, 189, 
Acknowledgements, 191, 

CHAPTER 1

Who We Are

My family history is a mix of immigrants.

Our roots run as far back as the first American settlers, on my French-English side, to the turn of the 20th century, on my Irish-Italian-German-Jewish side. Yet, as far apart and dissimilar as our sides might seem, there's one thing that that ties us together: the bond to family.

I was taught, by all sides, that you should give more than you get, and while this started with family, it expanded outward to include neighbors, and then, country. Some might see this as an obligation, one that is heavy and often hard to bear, but I don't. I believe that one of the greatest gifts my ancestors gave me was a passion to put family first. Growing up, I heard stories about what this meant to the earlier generations, and sometimes, I saw it clearly, myself.

In Canton, Ohio. Sunday dinners were hosted by my paternal Italian grandmother.

Regardless of the economics of the time, her table was always full of food and people. All were welcome, and all showed up: cousins, friends, borders from the past, as well as the present. I heard that none of that changed much, when, even in midst of the Depression, my great-grandparents, Antonio and Assunta DeCosmo, shared all they had with their neighbors, so no one would suffer.

In southern West Virginia, close to the New River, my maternal grandparents lived on top of Hix Mountain and had their own orchards and gardens. "Extreme hospitality" sounds like it could be the name of a reality TV show, but it was actually my grandparents, John and Gerline Lilly's manner of living. Their table was always full of wonderful food, and their door was always open to anyone passing through. Just as in my Italian grandmother's home, here too, it was a high offense not to eat what was given. The only difference? Grandma Della (Assunta's daughter) offered pizza as an appetizer, dandelion greens salad, sautéed green, red and yellow peppers and sausage, spaghetti, and sliced oranges with olive oil and pepper. Compared to Grandma Lilly's offering of meatloaf, fresh green beans, white beans with corn bread, loaded with butter, made in a cast iron skillet, and pies of every possible variety.

Though food was a large part of what it meant to care for someone, or show your love, it didn't stop there. You could always count on having more attention being lavished on you as guest in either of their homes than at a 5-Star resort hotel. Should you find yourself sick, you'd receive better treatment than if you were in the intensive care unit at a major hospital. And though I was grateful to be nursed back, not just to full health, but to perfect health, part of me always feared what seemed to be the very real possibility of smothering to death under the weight of heavy wool blankets, or drowning to death by a third, necessary, cup of tea.

Growing up I thought this was all quite normal, and understood that loving each other meant supporting each other ... in whatever way was needed.

So when I started my business 18 years ago and my daughter, Adellina, was ill, I didn't hesitate to ask my mother to move to Columbus to help. It was ideal, as it would provide a house for them to live in for as long as they desired. The kids would grow, and need less and less help, which was a perfect plan, because as my parents aged, they'd probably be able to help less. Not only would they not have to worry about what they could, or could not, afford to move into after my father retired, the house had room for family to visit comfortably.

She accepted our offer, and two years later, after my father retired, he followed; during those two years he drove the two hours down from Canton every weekend to be with my mother. It was the ideal exchange, as she could help with my kids, and have room for the rest of the grandkids around when they'd come from all around: Kentucky, Las Vegas, and other parts of Ohio. There were summers when my mother would pack up the kids and drive them down to West Virginia to see her parents, my kids' great-grandparents, while other summers saw her heading out with them to Las Vegas to visit my sister who lived there.

But as innovative an idea as this may sound, it really wasn't. When my father's parents could no longer function at home by themselves, they'd rotate among their four kids' homes. My grandparents enjoyed living this way right up until their last two years of life, when, at 98 and nearly 100 years old, they moved into an "Assisted Living" home. But for them, and their families, "assisted living" was really what they had been doing all those years.

Seeing everyone in the family always pitching in to help each other out, seeing multiple generations together, this was all normal for me, and so in the back of my mind I always had a Master Plan, and with my parents living in a house nearby, Phase One was officially up and running.

In 2004, my grandfather John Lilly, a former West Virginia coal miner, got black lung disease. The decision was made to sell the farm on the mountaintop, the one with the beautiful orchards and gardens, and move in with my parents in Columbus. Every morning, my children would go to my parents' house and would have breakfast with their grandparents and great grandparents. Is that normal? For my kids it was. And when my grandfather passed after 3 months, my grandmother continued to live with my parents.

The years went by and things went on this way, trouble-free. But as with every good story, this plot had a twist, and it can be described in one word: Grandma. First she turned 91, then 92. She was living with my mother and father (see the pattern?) and one day it suddenly dawned on me, Grandma could live to 99, or 100, just like my other grandparents! And what on earth would happen if she...

Details zur Ausgabe

• Verlag: iUniverse
• Erscheinungsdatum: 2017
• Sprache: Englisch
• ISBN 10: 1532020635
• ISBN 13: 9781532020636
• Einband: Taschenbuch
• Anzahl der Seiten: 208
• Kontakt zum Hersteller: Nicht verfügbar
• Verantwortliche Person: gpsr@libri.de; gpsr@libri.de; ; Friedensallee 273; Hamburg; 22763; Deutschland