2024 - Hardcover

Rall, Ted

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 1561632791 ISBN 13: 9781561632794

Verlag: NBM Publishing Company, 2001

Inhaltsangabe

Move forward two decades. See the world as the giant media moguls and software companies have become our new big brothers. They want the best for us. They know what's best for us. And maybe we don't always know so well.
Ted 'I-need-more-enemies' Rall updates 1984 in a scathing look at where we could be headed; and this is all Rall, no holes barred, no prisoners. His best and most chillingly funny work yet!

Über diesen Titel

Über die Autorin bzw. den Autor

Twice winner of the Robert F. Kennedy Journalism Award and a Pulitzer Prize finalist, Ted Rall is a syndicated editorial cartoonist and columnist for Universal Press Syndicate. His previous books include To Afghanistan and Back, and Revenge of the Latchkey Kids.

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2024

By Ted Rall

Nantier Beall Minoustchine Publishing

Copyright © 2003 Ted Rall
All right reserved.
ISBN: 9781561632794

Chapter One

IT WAS A BRIGHT HOT DAY IN APRIL, AND THE BATTEREDTEXAS INSTRUMENTS WATCH ON WINSTON'S WRIST, PURCHASEDIN A MOMENT OF IRONIC CONSUMERISM AT A FLEA MARKET,WAS BEEPING THIRTEEN.

WINSTON NODDED AT THE BORED DESKATTENDANT AND SCANNED HIMSELFINTO HIS LUXE/RIVER VU/2 BR INBATTERY PARK TOWER D. HE WAS ONEOF THE LUCKY ONES-HE KNEW THAT.

INSIDE, A SCREENFLICKERED, CASEYCASEM, JR.'S VOICEREADING OFF A LONGLIST OF CONSUMERGOODS AVAILABLE ATBARGAIN PRICES.

DAMN BROWNOUTS!

SOMETIMES, WINSTONWONDERED WHY WEB TVNEVER TURNED OFF, BUT HEWAS A WORD GUY-HE DIDN'TUNDERSTAND INTERNALCOMBUSTION, MUCH LESSMICROTECH. ALL HE KNEWWAS, HE LOVED TRADINGPOINTS TO BUY THINGS. ANDALL THAT MATTERED WASGETTING BY, GETTING AHEADAND GETTING DEAD.

YOU ARETHE HIGHBIDDER.YOU HAVEBEEN DEBITED114 UNITS.

YES! I'M THE FUCKING KING!

OUTSIDE THE TRIPLE-PANEDWINDOW, THE GLEAMING CITYBAKED UNDER THE OZONE-FREESUN. JUST A FEW BLOCKSAWAY, WINSTON'S OFFICE ATFREEDOM MEDIA OVERLOOKEDTHE UBIQUITOUS SLOGANS OFTHE NEW MILLENNIAL PROTOCOL.

SCATTERED ABOUT THE CITY WERE THE THREEORGANS OF THE CORPORATE-GOVERNMENT COMPLEX:

INDEPENDENT TECHNOLOGIES,WHICHOWNED ALL THETECHNOLOGY COMPANIESAND LICENSEDNEW ONES.

POPULIST PARTYHEADQUARTERS,WHICH CONCERNEDITSELF WITHSTIFLING INDEPENDENTTHOUGHT.

FREEDOM MEDIAENTERPRISES, AMULTINATIONALTHAT OWNED ANDCENSORED THEPRESS, RADIO ANDWEB TV.

WINSTON AWOKE FROM HIS SHOPPING REVERIE WITH A START.

WHAT THEHELL AM ITHINKING?

BIOGRAPHYOF WILLIAMGATESSECURED AND BILLED.

HE'D SPENT (3?) HOURS BUYINGSTUFF HE DIDN'T LIKE, HALF OFWHICH WAS ALREADY EN ROUTE.

IT HAD BEEN ANOTHERPERFECT DAY. WINSTONPREPARED FOR BED, SUBCONSCIOUSLY BLOCKING HIS SCREEN.

NATURALLY, WEB TV'SSIGNAL WENT THOUGH FLESH.

EARLIER THAT DAY, WINSTONCOMMITTED A SERIOUS CRIME.IT WAS THE ONLY FELONYBESIDES POSSESSION OF DRUGSOR UTTERING OBSCENITIES.

IS THIS THEREAL MEMORYENHANCER 4.0?

KINDAIT'S A REALI.T.BOOTLEG.

PEOPLE HAD SPENT 5YEARS IN A SLAVELABOR CAMP OVERBOOTLEGGED GAMES-BUT ITWAS WELL WORTH THE RISK.

AND THAT WASN'T THE WORSTOF IT. WINSTON SPENT HOURSIN THE CHATROOM, DISCUSSINGANAL SEX WITH LIBERTARIANSFROM THE KYRGYZ REPUBLIC.

I'VE JUST SENTYOU NAUGHTY PIX.PLEASE DOWNLOAD.

AREN'TTHOSE-?OKAY.

HE LIKED THE CHALLENGE OFRIDICULING HIS OPPONENTS'ARGUMENTS. BUT EVEN SO,THE BEST PART WAS USINGHIS BOSS' ACCOUNT.

ALTHOUGH A FEW KEYSTROKESLAID WASTE TO THE FREE-THINKERS,HE HAD A BIGWEAKNESS. HE COULDN'TREMEMBER ANYTHING FROMTHE PAST WITH ANY DEGREEOF CERTAINTY.

DID I PAYTHE STUDENTLOAN? YES.NO, WAIT-NO.

HE VAGUELY RECALLED ASERIES OF DIVORCES ANDREMARRIAGES DURING HISCHILDHOOD-PERHAPS 30OR 38, MAYBE MORE-ANDSOME POLITICAL UPHEAVALTHAT DIDN'T CONCERN HIM.

SON YOUR MOM AND I ARE SPUTTING.

YEAH, YEAH-IKNOW YOUSTILL LOVEME AND SHIT.

THERAPISTS HAD NEVERHELPED HIM. WOMEN BOREDTHE SHIT OUT OF HIM, AND HEWAS HAPPY: IT GAVE HIMMORE TIME TO SPEND ONHIMSELF, THINKING ABOUT NADA.

WHAT ELSE WAS THERE?ALL FACT, ALL LANGUAGE-EVENEXISTENCE ITSELF-HADBEEN PROVEN TOTALLYARBITRARY. NEOPOSTMODERNISMWAS THE PINNACLEOF THOUGHT. PARADOXICALLY,IT WAS ALSO THE UTTERABSENCE OF THOUGHT.

I CAN'T BELIEVEYOU'RE SORACIST!

RACISM ISARBITRARY!KNOWLEDGEIS DEAD!

THE NEXT DAY AS HE LEFT WORKTHROUGH TECH SQUARE, AFAMILIAR IMAGE APPEARED ON THEFAMOUS UNIVISION: THE PRESIDENT!

THE EUROS HAVE BEEN ILLEGALLY DUMPINGTHEIR PRODUCTS HERE IN THE CANAMEXICUSAFEE ECONOMIC ZONE. WE MUST IMPOSESANCTIONS ON THE ANTI-FREE MARKETEERS!

FUCKIN' A!

DAMN RIGHT!

THE PRESIDENT WASRIGHT! THE EC BASTARDSWERE OUT TO DESTROYSOCIETY! THESE SCUMHAD TO BE STOPPEDNO MATTER WHAT!

YOU LOOK 15%EUROPEAN-MAYBEI OUGHTTO BEAT YOU PURE!

YOU'REWELCOMETO TRY!

THERE WAS A COUPLE OF THEMRIGHT THERE! WINSTON TOREINTO THEM AS THEY DESERVED!

NO! I'M RUSSIAN!

LIAR!

THE COUPLE BARELY ESCAPEDDEATH BEFORE THINGS GOTSTRAIGHTENED OUT.

NO, IDIOTS-RUSSIA IS A CANAMEXICUSAN ALLY!HAVEN'T YOU MORONSWATCHED YOUR WEB?

WINSTON RECOGNIZEDTHE BURLY MAN IN THECROWD ALMOSTINSTANTANEOUSLY.

HEY, THAT'STHE NEW S.V.P.-I DIDN'T KNOWHE ACTUALLYEXISTED!

BEFORE THE NEWS CONFERENCEHAD PROCEEDED FOR THIRTYMORE SECONDS, UNCONTROLLABLEEXCLAMATIONS OF RAGE SWEPTTHE CROWD. DESPITE PROPOSEDLAWS TO BAN THEM, A GAY-PRIDEPARADE IN SAN FRANCISCO WASENCOURAGING THE SPREAD OFDISEASE AND THE DESTRUCTION OFHETEROSEXUAL FAMILY VALUES!

THESE FLAMBOYANTPERVERTS AREFLOUTING DECENCY-AGAIN!AND THEPOLICE, WHO OUGHTTO BE ARRESTINGTHEM, ARE TOOOVERWHELMED TO ACT!

THE HATRED ROSE TO AFRENZY. NOW HOMOSWERE LURING CHILDRENBY ABUSING WEB TV!

SWINE!SWINE!

DAWN WAS 12 WHENA LESBIAN ILLEGALIMMIGRANT INSTANT-MESSAGED HER ...

HOW MUCH WORSE COULD ITGET? MILITIA NUTS OUTWEST HAD BLOWN UP A KEYCORPORATE HEADQUARTERS.

YOU SCHUM! MY LEGALLY-PURCHASEDPRODUCTSWERE IN THAT BUILDING!

UNITED SHIPPINGWILL REOPENA WEEK FROMMONDAY, ACCORDINGTO CANAMEXICUSANAUTHORITIES.

IF THE SOCIAL ORDERIS EVER TO FALL APART,IT'LL BE BECAUSE OFLEFTISTS OR RIGHTISTS!

I'D GANG-RAPE THEMAND CHOKETHEM TO DEATH WITHTHEIR OWNCOCKS.

THESE EXTREMISTSTHREATENED EVERYTHING WINSTON CARED ABOUT-THEY HAD TO BE KILLED!

FORTUNATELY, NOBODYTOOK THEM SERIOUSLY ...THEY WERE RELICS OFTHE INDUSTRIAL PAST.

WINSTON RETURNEDTO TECH SQUARE,KNOWING IN ADVANCETHAT HE WOULD SEETHE LOUDMOUTHEDWOMAN AGAIN.

THE HEATHENSARE TRYING TOTAKE GODOUT OF THE CLASSROOM!

SWINE!SWINE!

KILL'EMALL!!

SHE WAS TYPICAL UPPER MANAGEMENT:HARD, PIERCED AND VAPID.HE WANTED TO HATE HER, BUTTHE MORE HE FANTASIZED ABOUTMURDERING HER, THE MORE HISPITY TURNED INTO LUST.

KILL ATHEISTS!

KILL ATHEISTS!

WHAT A HOTTIE!

HE KNEW HIS EMOTIONS CAME FROMA MOVIE, YET THEY FELT GENUINE.

HE WAS ABOUT TO USE A LINEFROM A MUSIC VIDEO ON HER-FUCKCOPYRIGHT LAW!-WHEN HE SAW A NEW STORE HE WANTEDTO CHECK OUT AND FORGOT ALLABOUT THE GIRL.

IS THIS THEOFFICIALBOOTLEG ORTHE BOOTLEGTHEREOF?

HUH? UH,YEAH.

THAT'S WHEN HENOTICED THE BOSSBUY STARING AT HIM.DAMN FAGGOT! HE'DPAY FOR HIS PERVERSEIMPERTINENCE!

REPORTING SEXUAL AGGRESSIONWAS BLISSFULLY SIMPLE.

WE JUST GOT THE PERP'SDNA, HE'LL BE ARRESTEDTODAY.

COOL!

JUSTICE MADE WINSTONTHIRSTY, SO HE DECIDEDTO VISIT A TRENDY BARTHAT SERVED ONLY LATTESAND MARGARITAS.

LATTE ORMARG? ANDQUIT STARINGAT MY TITS.

HE NEVER TALKED TO ANYONE.WHY BOTHER? PEOPLE WEREMORE INTERESTING IN THEONLINE ETHER THAN IN THE"REAL" WORLD. BESIDES, NOONE PERSON KNEW ANYTHINGMORE THAN ANYONE ELSE.EDUCATION WAS UNIFORM,EXPERIENCE WAS STANDARDIZED,AND ORIGINALITY WASRUTHLESSLY STOMPED OUT.

OK. I ADMITIT. I DIDN'TWATCH THEULTRABOWL.

FAG.

THE CHAIN BAR-CAFI'SBEVERAGES WERE BITTERAND OVERPRICED, BUTEVERYONE DRANK THEMANYWAY BECAUSE THEYWERE SO POPULAR.

HEY, HOW ABOUT THATI.P.O., HUH? HAVE AGOOD ONE!

UH-HUH.

FOR GOD KNEW HOW LONG, SOMEPRANKSTER HAD BEENCLOGGING WINSTON'S INBOXWITH REPEATEDLY. RESENTFILES. AS USUAL, HEREPORTED THE OFFENDER TOTHE WEBMASTER.

DAMMIT! BOTH THEWAR DIARIES ANDNOTEBOOKS FOR ANETHICS IN ONE E-MAIL?

THAT AFTERNOON, F.M.E.SECURITY NABBEDTHE CULPRIT. THEY'DTRACKED HIM THROUGHAN OLD SATELLITE CODEHE'D FORGOTTEN TO PURGE.

IN 3 MONTHS ALL THE SOAP INLUXEMBOURG WILL TASTE LIKE YOU.

KNOW YOUR LEVEL

IT HAD BEEN A PAINFULLY LONGDAY, AND ALL WINSTON COULDTHINK ABOUT WAS PLAYING HISNEW GAME. BUT THEN-

OH-HI,MRS.PARSONS.

IT'S THECHILDREN.THEY HAVEN'TGONE OUTALL DAY.

HOW IRONIC! WINSTONCOULDN'T AFFORD KIDSOF HIS OWN, BUT HEHAD TO TAKE CARE OFHIS NEIGHBORS' SO THEYCOULD GO OUT DRINKING.

IT'S A DOUBLE-HEADER,SO WE SHOULD BE BACKIN A FEW HOURS.

WORST OF ALL, THE LITTLE BRATSWERE DRONES IN TRAINING.THEY PLAYED AT INFOTECH,THREATENING WINSTON WITHGETTING FIRED AND...

Details zur Ausgabe

• Verlag: NBM Publishing Company
• Erscheinungsdatum: 2001
• Sprache: Englisch
• ISBN 10: 1561632791
• ISBN 13: 9781561632794
• Einband: Gebundene Ausgabe
• Anzahl der Seiten: 96
• Kontakt zum Hersteller: Nicht verfügbar
• Verantwortliche Person: Nicht verfügbar