Twins: A Practical Guide to Parenting Multiples from Conception to Preschool - Softcover

Bowman, Katrina; Ryan, Louise

Softcover

ISBN 10: 1743318669 ISBN 13: 9781743318669

Verlag: ALLEN & UNWIN (AUSTRALIA), 2014

Inhaltsangabe

When Louise and Katrina discovered they were having twins, both had the same thought once they recovered from the shock: buy a book that explains what to expect in order to get organised and to prepare emotionally and physically for the anticipated upheaval to their lives. When they couldn't find such a text, they decided to write it themselves.
Based on extensive research as well as their own and other twin parents' experiences of pregnancy, birth and twin toddlers, Katrina and Louise offer sound practical advice that is backed up by medical practitioners and health professionals where relevant. Detailed information with user-friendly explanations of medical jargon is peppered with amusing and moving stories of catastrophe, chaos and coping. There are at-a-glance hints and survival tips at the end of each chapter and easy-reference tables of information throughout.
The number of multiple births is rapidly increasing due to IVF and the older age range of new mothers. More people are having twins (or multiples) than ever before. This is the book they have to have.

Über diesen Titel

Über die Autorin bzw. den Autor

Katrina Bowman and Louise Ryan are each a mother of twins, and are active in a support network for twin parents.

Auszug. © Genehmigter Nachdruck. Alle Rechte vorbehalten.

Twins

A Practical Guide to Parenting Multiples From Conception to Preschool

By Katrina Bowman, Louise Ryan

Allen & Unwin

Copyright © 2014 Katrina Bowman and Louise Ryan
All rights reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-74331-866-9

Contents

Foreword, 
Before you read on, 
THERE'S A PAIR IN THERE: FINDING OUT IT'S TWINS, 
TURKEY PLATTERS AND TOILET BOWLS: PREGNANCY, 
SAFETY, CUPBOARDS AND COMPOST: GETTING ORGANISED, 
HOW WILL THEY GET OUT: BIRTH, 
WHY ARE YOU CRYING: HOSPITAL, 
THE RIGHT SUPPORT: BREASTFEEDING, 
SIXTEEN BOTTLES SITTING ON THE BENCH: BOTTLE-FEEDING, 
I'M COMPLETELY ALONE EXCEPT FOR TWO BABIES: HOME, 
ELLEN DEGENERES IS MY NEW BEST FRIEND: MOTHERHOOD, 
DYNAMICS AND DYNAMITE: RELATIONSHIPS, 
THE BLURRY PERIOD: SLEEP, 
COMING, READY OR NOT: PRE-TERM BABIES, 
WHEN BAD THINGS HAPPEN: LOSING A TWIN, 
WHICH ONE IS WHICH: THE TWIN SITUATION, 
ACTUALLY, THERE ARE THREE: TRIPLETS, 
Notes, 
Glossary, 
Recommended Reading, 
Resources, 
Acknowledgements, 
Australian Twin Registry, 

CHAPTER 1

There's a pair in there

FINDING OUT IT'S TWINS

FINDING OUT IT'S TWINS: OUR STORIES

In the past many women didn't know they were having twins until the birth. We're now most likely to find out well before our babies are born. Doctors sometimes find twins when they're checking for a heartbeat and hear two, or by feeling two heads through your abdomen. Usually the discovery is made during an ultrasound at any time between six and 20 weeks. If you've had fertility treatment, earlier miscarriages, bleeding or any other reason to be concerned, you may be given an ultrasound scan at around six weeks (where two tiny heartbeats may be detected). Ultrasound scans for a naturally conceived twin pregnancy are usually done between 18 and 20 weeks, unless there is a suspicion that the woman is bigger than usual. The vast majority of women have an ultrasound at 12 weeks to test for Down syndrome (nuchal translucency).

You may have suspected you were having two babies before it was confirmed by ultrasound. Sometimes it's because of extreme sickness, especially when you can compare it to an earlier pregnancy or because you seem larger than expected or have put on a lot of weight. Or you may have had no idea.

Katrina: Are you sure you're not having twins, you're big for 20 weeks, was the comment from a wry colleague. There aren't any twins in my family; I just had a bit of padding there to start with, was my equally lighthearted reply. My sister and I joked the day before the ultrasound that if it's twins she can have one of them.

At our first ultrasound the technician kept remarking on how the baby was moving around a lot. I was very eager for confirmation that we were having a girl. Then he said it. There are two babies. We laughed; surely he was joking. He showed us the screen and pointed out two heads.

I spoke my first thought. 'Are they Siamese?'

'What do you mean by Siamese?'

'Stuck together.'

'There's nothing to indicate that.'

I burst into tears.

'It's not that I don't love them,' I tell my husband. 'I'm just a bit shocked. How will we ever cope with two?' He reassures me, 'We'll do it together.'

On the way home in the car the tears were still flowing and I realised I was wrong. I didn't love them. I didn't want them. I didn't want two babies. It was too late for a termination. Perhaps I'd lose them. How would we ever manage? How could I have been so unlucky?

I have always felt sorry for twins. Having someone who looks just like you, always competing with you. They lose their individuality. I didn't want my children to have that.

I had always wanted children. We delayed it for some years, then when I decided it was time we managed to conceive first try, much to my husband's disappointment! If I'd known I was going to have twins, I thought, I would have really questioned having children. Still, it had been my decision to have a baby. This was actually my fault. What had I done?

I had an instant and desperate need to know more about twins and how we could raise them as individuals. We spent the evening researching. It appeared from the scan that our twins were probably identical, which is not genetic, just a one in 250 chance of a pregnancy being identical twins. It was my egg that had split. Perhaps I shouldn't have jumped in that hot tub? Did heat cause eggs to split? This really is my fault. That seed of self-blame was planted.

I quickly realised that a large part of my distress was grief. I was grieving for the loss of a single baby. For years I held in my mind's eye a peaceful image of me rocking my baby in the sunshine. But now I was not going to have any peace, no one-on-one close contact. I felt I was being denied time to love my children. I would be too busy just coping. I felt very sorry for myself.

I knew I had no right to moan. It wasn't like someone had died. My babies appeared healthy. I shouldn't have felt like this. I should have been over the moon. What was wrong with me? Why was this happening?

Louise: Getting pregnant is an accident for some couples, easy for others, hard work for many and, sadly, for some couples it's impossible. I knew one in eight couples had difficulty conceiving, so I never assumed I'd fall pregnant easily but of course hoped I would. After eight months of unsuccessful well-timed effort my partner and I went for tests to discover what was going wrong. The problem was sperm antibodies interfering with fertilisation. Each of my eggs needed to be fertilised by being injected with one of his sperm. This would be done via IVF.

The process of IVF is an emotional roller-coaster; exciting and terrifying when you begin a cycle and devastating when it fails. The snorting and injecting of hormones, the blood tests, internals and ultrasounds would be easy if you could be sure you'd be pregnant this time or next time or the time after that. The traumatic part is, you have no idea whether you'll ever fall pregnant and if you do, that you won't miscarry.

Looking back, I'm amazed that for our treatment cycles we were so keen to have three fertilised eggs transferred. This meant possible triplets, but also possibly still no pregnancy. Having become so used to not becoming pregnant we wanted to give it the best chance. I've since spoken to many IVF twin mums who chose to transfer two fertilised eggs even after a couple of unsuccessful cycles. Oddly, while doing the cycle, we talked a lot about whether or not I'd be pregnant but barely mentioned twins, let alone triplets. We both knew that a pregnancy after three fertilised eggs have been transferred meant a 20 per cent chance of twins and a five per cent chance of triplets.

I've since learnt that when two good-quality eggs are transferred there is a 25 — 35 per cent chance of pregnancy and with three good-quality eggs, the chance of pregnancy is only increased to 26 per cent. I wish I'd known and been able to weigh up our chances versus the risk of triplets, given the physical, social, emotional and financial consequences.

Having done my second IVF cycle, I found out I was pregnant the day my period was due. My nurse said there was a possibility of more than one baby, as my hormone levels were high but I put that possibility straight out of my mind. Didn't dare to hope. I had an ultrasound four weeks later. Any ultrasound scan done at that stage of a pregnancy shows a tiny little stick with a beating heart, which is...

Details zur Ausgabe

• Verlag: ALLEN & UNWIN (AUSTRALIA)
• Erscheinungsdatum: 2014
• Sprache: Englisch
• ISBN 10: 1743318669
• ISBN 13: 9781743318669
• Einband: Taschenbuch
• Anzahl der Seiten: 348
• Kontakt zum Hersteller: Nicht verfügbar
• Verantwortliche Person: Nicht verfügbar