Toddler Owner's Manual: Father's Edition - Softcover

Bedwell, Steve

Softcover

ISBN 10: 1925017192 ISBN 13: 9781925017199

Verlag: ROCKPOOL PUB, 2015

Inhaltsangabe

A humorous operating guide for fathers, the Toddler Owner's Manual is sure to bring a smile to any dad's face. Written by a man for men, this book likens a toddler to the other love in a man's life, not his wife his car. This companion piece to the successful Baby Owner's Manual is also packaged in the form of a retro car manual.

This essential handbook covers the difficult ownership period of your Mother Nature Heavy Industry child from 18 months to three years. This out of warranty period can be difficult and the manual will help fathers navigate such vexing stages as solid food consumption, child self waste disposal training, tentative first steps as well as long term servicing and immunization issues and maximizing the usefulness of your toddler. This is a must have book for any father facing the challenges of a rapidly developing 'little human'.

Über diesen Titel

Über die Autorinnen und Autoren

Written by Steve Bedwell, a man who loves his cars. Steve Bedwell is a comedy writer, television host, a radio personality, author, producer, ARIA nominated recording artist and comedian. Currently a regular panelist on Australian talkback radio, Steve is also a regular opinion panelist on Australian national TV. He is the author of Suburban Icons: A Celebration of the Everyday (1992), Vizard Uncut (2007) Baby Owner's Manual (2011). Steve has recently completed a successful tour of the Los Angeles comedy circuit.

Written by Steve Bedwell, a man who loves his cars. Steve Bedwell is a comedy writer, television host, a radio personality, author, producer, ARIA nominated recording artist and comedian. Currently a regular panelist on Australian talkback radio, Steve is also a regular opinion panelist on Australian national TV. He is the author of Suburban Icons: A Celebration of the Everyday (1992), Vizard Uncut (2007) Baby Owner's Manual (2011). Steve has recently completed a successful tour of the Los Angeles comedy circuit.

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Toddler Owner's Manual

Father's Edition

By Steve Bedwell, Glenda Downing

Rockpool Publishing

Copyright © 2014 Steve Bedwell
All rights reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-925017-19-9

Contents

A word of introduction from Mother Nature Heavy Industries Pty Ltd, 
Section A: The Road to Toddling, 
Section B: The Terrible Twos, 
Section C: Eating, Sleeping and Toilet Training, 
Section D: Correcting Bad Habits and Unwanted Behaviour, 
Section E: Entertainment and Beyond the Home, 
Further reading and resources, 
Appendix: Service history, 

CHAPTER 1

Section A:

The Road to Toddling

The First Anniversary

The first year of ownership of your child has been a tough one with many compromises to you and the co-owner's lifestyle and habits, not to mention sleep deprivation. Let's face it, babies and their nocturnal habits can be a nightmare. MNHI deliberately engineers its babies this way to prepare you for the rigors of toddler ownership.

Successfully raising a baby and getting to the end of the warranty period and to the commencement of the toddler phase of your child's life is an event to be celebrated, and MNHI has several recommendations on how to mark this momentous occasion. This occasion and the ensuing event will be henceforth be referred to as 'the party'.

The end of warranty party is a time of great rejoicing for the owner and co-owner. Suddenly your baby is not a baby any more and the security of the MNHI warranty protection plan has passed. What better time to celebrate ... or perhaps not? For the sake of the party and the enjoyment of the invitees, MNHI suggests that you concentrate on the birthday and less on the warranty running out.

MNHI would like to address several of the more common questions that its consultants get asked in relation to the one-year birthday party.

Who should I invite? MNHI advises it is important that this milestone be shared with as many of your living relatives as possible, even though you might not have seen most of them since you first took delivery of the baby. This is so you don't have to see the annoying ones for at least another year, and also to increase the present haul.

An array of adult friends should also be invited to the party. These are those friends who have been there for you with advice and assistance, whether wanted or not – let's face it, everyone's an expert – during the hiccups of the first year of ownership. This, too, will also help to increase the present haul.

It is important to point out that one of the prime reasons for hosting a first birthday party is the presents ... it's not like the child is going to remember it. Those adult friends you invite may also have children of a similar age, so you will be able compare the progress of your child with theirs. When comparing children and their progress, it is important to exaggerate and paint your child as being far more advanced than he is, because if you don't, the other parents will beat you to it.

Feel free to also invite acquaintances you have met during the course of your first year of baby ownership. You may have met these people through parent support groups or at a MNHI service centre while your babies were being attended to. Once again, these guests will bring presents for your child, and this is primarily what the party is about.

Remember, this is a baby party in name alone. This event is actually an excuse to get adults together to socialise and compare notes on toddler ownership. It should be noted that at least half of the advice given by friends and relatives on to

Details zur Ausgabe

• Verlag: ROCKPOOL PUB
• Erscheinungsdatum: 2015
• Sprache: Englisch
• ISBN 10: 1925017192
• ISBN 13: 9781925017199
• Einband: Taschenbuch
• Anzahl der Seiten: 128
• Kontakt zum Hersteller: Nicht verfügbar
• Verantwortliche Person: KreGa Onlinehandel GmbH; 4950000000000; info@krega-onlinehandel.de; ; Birkenweg 31; Brakel; 33034; Deutschland