There is a difference between disagreement and the pain of
being misunderstood.
For twenty years I was in a relationship. Fifteen of those years
were spent in a marriage I had committed myself to honoring. I
entered that commitment believing in love, partnership, loyalty,
and the promises that come with building a life together.
But behind the commitment was a reality that many people
never fully understood. This was not simply a relationship I was
trying to navigate. This was my marriage. This was my life. I had
invested years of my heart, my energy, my hopes, and my effort
in trying to preserve it.
I experienced infidelity, abuse, disrespect, neglect,
manipulation, abandonment, and lies. People witnessed
portions of the turmoil, but very few understood the magnitude
of what was happening behind closed doors.
I remained silent through more than many people will ever
know. I continued to show up, maintained appearances, and
tried to make sense of circumstances that were emotionally and
mentally overwhelming.
I was not looking for people to choose sides. I wanted to
understand what was right, what was wrong, what
accountability looked like, and how I could find a way through
circumstances that had become deeply entangled in my life
There is a tremendous difference between expecting someone to
agree with you and wanting someone to acknowledge the reality
of what you are experiencing.
I did not create the circumstances I was trying to survive, and I
should not have to carry the burden of a narrative that
misrepresents my experience.
I am telling my story because my experience is real, my truth
deserves a voice, and someone else’s freedom may begin when
they hear that they are not alone.
Your story does not end with what you endured
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