Congratulations on the birth of your baby! In this child, you see infinite potential and you place great hope. And now you're preparing to celebrate what is perhaps the most joyous rite of passage-the baby blessing ceremony. Like many parents, you may wish to plan a personalized ceremony that repects who you are as a family and what you believe. In Bless This Child, author Susanna Stefanachi Macomb presents a comprehensive selection of ceremonial elements for baby blessings. She has culled from the best traditions around the world and developed new ones, combining spiritual as well as humanist aspects. This guide includes poetry, prose, scripture, prayers, vows, opening words, and closing blessings; moving rituals including candle-lighting, naming, and anointing; suggestions on embracing grandparents, godparents, and siblings; practical advice for working with offciants and locales; language appropriate for an interfaith, intercultural assembly of family and guests; sample ceremonies that demonstrate how creative alternatives and traditional aspects can blend to create a memorable event. Warm and encouraging, Bless This Child provides a guidebook for parents who wish to create a special way of welcoming their child into the world. Bless This Child is also an excellent resource for clergy and humanist offciants who perform interfaith baby blessing ceremonies.
Bless This Child
A Comprehensive Guide to Creating Baby Blessing CeremoniesBy Susanna Stefanachi Macomb Andrea ThompsoniUniverse, Inc.
Copyright © 2011 Rev. Susanna Stefanachi Macomb with Andrea Thompson
All right reserved.ISBN: 978-1-4620-4973-8Contents
Preface.........................................................................................xiIntroduction: About This Book...................................................................xiiiPart I First Steps..............................................................................11. With Each Child, the World Begins Anew!......................................................32. Thinking about Your Ceremony: A Questionnaire for Parents....................................93. Logistics: The Who, What, Where, and When of Your Baby Blessing Ceremony.....................174. Sensitivities and Considerations for the Interfaith Family...................................25Part II The Baby Blessing Ceremony: A Menu of Elements..........................................33Readings, Prayers, Blessings, Rituals, and Quotes...............................................34Processional....................................................................................35Welcoming Words.................................................................................35Readings........................................................................................38Rituals.........................................................................................61Part III Mothers, Fathers, Babies...............................................................83Real Life Stories, Real Life Ceremonies.........................................................84Part IV Down the Years..........................................................................125Raising Your Child in Spiritual Wisdom..........................................................126A Final Word....................................................................................137A Resource Directory............................................................................139Permissions Acknowledgments.....................................................................145About the Author................................................................................147
Chapter One
With Each Child, the World Begins Anew!
A child enters into our midst, and face to face, hand to hand with this perfect creation, we are compelled to whisper, "It's a miracle." In this child we see infinite potential and we place our greatest hopes.
A baby reminds us from where we came. A baby takes us back to who we really are, before we accumulated all the layers of life. A child points to our innocence, to purity, and to glee, for only a baby has the capacity to laugh like that, at the sheer joy of being alive. When we witness a child's indescribable belly laugh, we rediscover who we are. As Christianity teaches: "Verily I say unto you, unless you become as little children, you shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven ... for of such is the kingdom of God." Simply put, children are closer to heaven.
Babies even smell like heaven! What parent does not rush home, perhaps from a hard day at work, yearning for the sweet smell of her newborn? With our noses nuzzled into the top of our babies' heads or in the crooks of our toddlers' necks, we feel we are home, right where the heart is. Embracing a child brings us back to what is truly important in life, and our day falls again into perspective. We experience a sense of inner peace and belonging.
When a child is born, all else in our lives seems to pale in comparison. Often we wonder what we did before having children that was really important. Life seems permanently divided into two parts: prebaby and postbaby. As one parent wrote to me, "I wish I could tell you how she has changed our lives, but I honestly can't remember what life was like before her. It is like all the questions have been answered." Can there be anything more life transforming?
And so, my heartfelt congratulations on the birth of your new baby! You have embarked on an exciting journey, one that will take you to places that you cannot even imagine at this point. For such a momentous rite of passage, many families feel a need to welcome and bless their children with a ceremony. With our hearts filled with gratitude for the gift of this newly arrived soul, it is a time to celebrate. Among the first questions on the minds of new parents is this one: How do we introduce our baby to our world and our world to our baby? If you are reading this book, this is probably the question on your mind right now. A baby welcoming, after all, is truly one of the handful of great and grand memorable events that span a lifetime, the passages that mark major family transitions.
I have led hundreds of such baby blessings, and these are absolutely my favorite ceremonies to perform because to me they represent pure and boundless joy. The grace I meet upon these children's faces, the presence of their families in my life, are the great gifts of my work. This is a work that makes the heart sing! As an ordained interfaith minister, I serve families from an amazing variety of backgrounds. They are nondenominational, interfaith, intercultural, multicultural, interracial, interdenominational, same faith, and humanist. Among them are traditionalists and nontraditionalists, the religious and nonreligious, liberals and conservatives. I spend time getting to know each of my families. And I have learned a great deal about the needs and wishes of modern-day parents.
Some are seeking ideas on how to plan and carry out a welcoming ceremony for their child that is nonreligious but spiritual in nature. Some wonder if it's possible to incorporate individualized elements within the traditional services and practices of the church, the synagogue, or the mosque. Others are faced with the need to honor and acknowledge different faiths and family traditions.
Many new parents looking for just such advice and suggestions have found me through my website and my previous book, Joining Hands and Hearts, about designing interfaith wedding ceremonies. Here is a small sampling from the e-mails I have received:
"What my husband and I know for sure is that we want our child to be honored and welcomed into this world properly and that we would like a ceremony based on love and life and in celebration of both families and our new joy."
"When we were married, we had a wonderful, inclusive wedding ceremony attended by my parish priest and a rabbi. We were really pleased with the nature of our ceremony, but we have not been able to find local resources in terms of raising an interfaith child or even how to conduct a naming ceremony that might be inclusive like our wedding."
"I've been trying to think ahead about a ceremonial celebration of the birth of our first baby. We are no longer affiliated with any church, but we believe in the sacred event of life and want to honor that somehow, in a powerful, connecting way that brings our families and friends together to celebrate the life of our child."
"This is our first child and we wish to create a ceremony for him that welcomes him into this world and celebrates his uniqueness. We particularly liked the idea you mention of a ceremony that honors family members and friends. You also state that your ceremonies have a universal context. This is especially important to us."
Do you hear echoes of your own hopes and concerns...
