We once lived in an era that turned back the moments in time when the heterosexual was the dominant ruler and controller of society. Now as we fast forward into the millennium a new denomination holds the destiny to the new world as we know it today. Let us journey through two men's lives as they set a new precedence that runs from Washington DC to Down Town USA. Let us share with you the testamentary foot prints on how we conquered marriage, success, adoption and our own assimilation. Are we two gay men or are we two people who choose a sexual orientation different from yours. We hold the credentials for setting the foundation in paving the path by allowing Federal Laws of America to allow sexual orientation to being a protected class under Title 7. After nearly seventeen years of being partnered we have become married as husband and husband. Being the first husband and husband to adopt as father and father in New York State has made us the poster child for generations to come. Let us tell you how to adopt locally without money through the raffs of the Child Welfare System. Let's journey down our memory lane tell you how Daddy and Daddy have five beautiful children who have all had our DREAMS COME TRUE, now yet yours. The Child Welfare system provides many free services and incentives for adoption and foster care that also focus' on single parent adoptions as well as husband and wife adoptions. This book is dedicated for people in need of family's not people in need of money. Remember it takes a Village to raise a child.

Daddy & Daddy Against The Odds

By Gregory A. Miller

AuthorHouse

Copyright © 2012 Gregory A. Miller
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4685-5229-4

Chapter One

Recently I have been coming to terms that I am a middle aged man who has come to accept the fact that age is only number and that now is the greatest time of my life. Many people always wish that they could turn back the clock and drop twenty years off their age. Not me, I wouldn't change a thing. All the mistakes I have made in my life have given me the wisdom and knowledge that I carry with me in day to day life. Many say that being fifty is the new forty and I am still analyzing that perception.

Of course I like many others have many regrets in life, but I believe I made those mistakes and poor choices the first time around in order to never make them again. I am not your typical guy across the street and by society's standards many people do not believe that I am normal. I have a passion for the Civil Rights Movement and a mission in life to advocate for those who have been classified as a minority or for those that feel they stand alone. I being a minority in my own way can feel the pain that others feel who have been targeted, singled out or branded as a minority. I will tell you a little secret and that is that everybody has something about themselves that someone else does not like. So I ask you, is everybody a minority or is the world that we live in moving to slowly to the times?

I grew up in a small incorporated village on the South Shore of Long Island back in the early 1960s. Life in those days was so simple and laid back for the children. I believe it was very complicated for the adults. We had minimal technology and everything was done manually. Our imaginations had taken us to places that this generation good never imagine. The creativeness for recreation was very original as well as entertaining. Even they food industry was so minimized; things we buy today were all homemade back in the day. Nevertheless I am one of five children and the second to the youngest and now the baby since my brother's death in 1969.

Life appeared to be normal until I reached Junior High School and the hormones started kicking in and that's when it all begun. In my time people were a lot more reserved and lived a religious and pure life. Once I reached the seventh grade I use to day dream in school and admire others in my mind. I knew something was wrong when I still considered girls to be yucky and the guys were cute. Being brought up in a strong Catholic setting we did not have a lot of teen sex and we followed our beliefs. I am quite sure that not everyone lived free of sin, but I did.

Once I reached the ninth grade just shortly after my mother's death I had to grow up very fast. I went from being a child to being a survivor. I actually was raised to have childhood jobs like folding newspapers in the drug store on Sunday mornings to washing dishes in the local coffee shop after school. I always new how to earn a dollar from the age of twelve onward. At sixteen I was forced to drop out of school and get my first fulltime job. Having to support yourself at a very young age left minimal time for friends and socializing. Because I had so many obligations has stalled my social life and made me what some would call today as a late bloomer.

Even at my first job as a busboy I worked with other young guys like myself. There was one guy who was my age who was very handsome by my standards. Not realizing what gay or straight really meant yet had left me in the closet. I never acted on my impulses and I never dared to violate the coworker professional relationship. While searching for my sexual identity I attempted to do what society expected from me. I did have a crush on a cashier whose name was Linda. And I even dated her several times. Something was not right because I adored her as a friend but just did not have the attraction for her that I should have had. By the time I reached my eighteenth birthday is when I realized that I was gay and that I did in fact like guys. This is when I had become a minority and had to learn to live a segregated life. Even in the 1980s gay life was not accepted and gay people had to live a double life. Because of whom I was and what I liked had me remain in the closet. All relationships were kept in secret and nobody from my neck of the woods dressed or acted as gays do in this generation.

My friends and family properly had me figured out, but I did not break my blue wall of silence. During my time people did not confront you or ask too many questions unless they were fighting with you and that is when their true colors came out. In my nearly fifty years of life I can honestly state that I have had three serious relationships with partners in life. Living the life as I call it has been one challenge after another. So many times in my life I have questioned myself over and over. I always asked myself why can't I be like everybody else and why can't my partner in life be accepted like those of married folks.

I have been blessed in many ways in life and then again I have had a very hard life as well. When the people of the world can sit back and say oh isn't that a nice couple, do you think they will marry and have children. People never said that about us.

For so many years I did what all of you must have done from time to time and that was to compare myself to others. Now I realize that you cannot live by similarity nor can you be what others want. I often wondered why some people seemed to have it all and life seemed so easy and perfect for them. Sometimes when we are looking in through the peep hole at others we only see the sugar coating. I have learned one thing and that is everything isn't always what it is viewed to be. It's like a perfect sugarcoated cupcake that looks so good on the outside and then you bite into it and it tastes like crap. Life can also be the same as that cupcake and only ages and wisdom will teach you how to mix up these ingredients.

As a child I had a nickname and it was I know I know. Oh when I look back and think of the mistakes I have made it makes me laugh now. I lacked a little thing called patience and I always wanted to do the things I did not know and never listened to anybody. I believe that when you have a debilitating perception that you have to compensate in other strengths in life. With my "I know" attitude I was seeking acceptance from others but I seemed to always fall by either destroying my project or injuring myself. My second mistake was not accepting criticism and I had an excuse for everything. Once you can pass these two obstacles in life you will bloom into a perfect flower.

I write in a weird way and I jump around a little and that is because I tell a story like an instruction book and it all comes together at the end. I love metaphors and setting the stage for a punch line so just bear with me. When you think you are lost at the crossroads suddenly you will find yourself at the finish line and the victory will be yours.

Because I not being like most, has made my life so complicated and that resulted into making a lot of mistakes and this is what has held me back from finding my assimilation. It took me a long time to figure this out. However this is where I differ from the perfect family who appear to have it all. In reality they do not have it all and the possessions that people own and the vision of their perfect life is just the foundation for the perfect storm.

When I was in my twenties I compared myself to many other families that I resented because they had it all and I was...