CHAPTER 1

Episode 1

Change Hearts One at a Time

There's always going to be bad stuff out there. But here's theamazing thing—light trumps darkness, every time. You stick acandle into the dark, but you can't stick the dark into the light.—Jodi Picoult

I miss my niece. Hell, I even miss my mom and dad. I am all alone. Imight even persuade someone to hold me tonight. But it would goagainst all of my moral beliefs, so I'll just sleep alone again. And let'sbe honest—I wouldn't have to pay someone to lay in bed with me. I'm quitecute and quite the cuddler.

I am currently twenty-five years old and working as an English teacher ina foreign country—South Korea, to be exact. I guess I'm of a different breed incertain ways. At least that's what I've been told. I like the feel of the big city, butI love the comfort and warmth of the beach and mountains. I want to travel,see the world, and experience all it has to offer, but I also want a husband and acouple little ones to love. I like to get outside my comfort zone, even with thoseI cannot communicate with due to a language barrier. But I also love sittingnext to someone I know inside and out and being able to know what they'refeeling or thinking.

I suppose every day I am figuring more of myself out. Every day I ambecoming more of the woman I set out to be. I used to like things—cars,apartments, clothes, houses. I didn't love them, and I never thought I couldn'tlive without them, but as I grow, I understand that those things are onlythings of this world, man created, not God created. I find myself drawn tothe things of the earth—the people, the sights, the sounds, the peacefulnessand innocence in a child. Earthly things, they would be here whether we werehere or not. But worldly things, man created, they are a temporary fix to amuch deeper, long-term yearning, an unfathomable fulfillment that a thingcould never fix. They pollute us and everything we surround ourselves with.They give us some false sense of security or hope that doesn't exist within, butrather exists for the temporary high of what feels like something that couldsatisfy you. But never does. So I say, the fewer things you need, the better offyou are.

In fact, I usually say, the less you own, the less that owns you.

Some people live a lifetime thinking they know everything. Some peopleeven die thinking they were always right. I know I don't know that much.Compared to Gandhi or other wise men and women, I really don't knowanything. I also know I'm wrong a lot. And I know that I know that I know thatall that matters in this world are those you love and that which you believe. Therest is just previews, what you are bound to watch before the main feature youactually wanted to see.

I am not a Christian because I always do what is right or even because Iknow what is right; I usually don't. Being a Christian is a daily struggle, but Iam Christian because I have faith. I believe in the unknown; I believe in whatI do not see. My faith turns my questions and worries into beliefs. Believing inthe unknown is hard—not because you don't want to believe, but because theintelligence of this world breeds skepticism.

"Nothing has caused the human race so much trouble as itsown intelligence." – Author Unknown

We were made to love, to serve, to touch others' hearts with our own. If you aredoing that, you are doing exactly what I intend to do.

I think at some point every one of us gets caught up in this world,waiting to get a new job, waiting for a raise, waiting to move, waiting toget married, waiting to tell someone you love him or her—in other words,waiting to be happy. So many of us get caught up in waiting that we forget tobe here now. We forget to live. So I say live now. Live for today. Ignore yourcell phone when you're talking to someone you respect. Love someone whodisrespects you. Hold the door for a stranger. Buy someone you care aboutflowers out of the blue. Be the best you that you can be. Change hopelesshearts one at a time.

I have spent my whole life working. At age fourteen, while sittingaround my birthday dinner at Applebee's on July 10, 1997, I was hired onthe spot to be a grocery sacker by a store director. It was family tradition towork at the local grocery store until you were old enough to get a real job.I was very excited about this at the time, and the grocery store director,Mark Davis, just happened to be at Applebee's, so it was an easy interview.I loved going to work, getting up for work, making money at work, being atwork—I loved everything about work. After two years as a sacker and thena cashier clerk, I got a job at a local clothing store called The Buckle; thatwas at age sixteen.

I should mention that my first high school boyfriend and I met while Iwas working at the grocery store. His name is Michael, and we were togetherfor a little over two years. It was, of course, the perfect high...