The Title of the book is "Don't Be a Foolish Virgin" The sub-title is "Confessions of a Foolish Virgin". When God gave me this title a few years ago, I did not understand what he wanted me to write. As I was studying the Bible a few years later, I came across this scripture, "Therefore this is what the LORD says: "Inquire among the nations: Who has ever heard anything like this? A most horrible thing has been done by Virgin Israel. Jeremiah 18:13 (NIV) and in Amos 5:1-2a says, Listen, you people of Israel! Listen to this funeral song I am singing: "The virgin Israel has fallen . . . "Virgin" is the Children of Israel, in current day we too are the Children of Israel. All of us are included. My Introduction starts with one of my favorite scriptures, "But the jar he was making did not turn out as he had hoped, so he crushed it into a lump of clay again and started over. Jeremiah 18:4. God is giving me an extreme makeover. This book is my story of how God showed me his unconditional love. You will learn what sin is, where sin came from, when and why we sin, who has sinned and the side-effects of sin. You will walk through forgiveness, asking and accepting forgiveness, and forgiving yourself and others. My goal is to help you focus on your state of mind when you fall and prepare you to avoid the attacks of the enemy. Your eyes will be opened to God's unconditional love for you as you read about Hosea's obedience to God by marrying Gomer, a harlot, to show his unconditional love for the Children of Israel. Do you know what your "special needs" are? If not, you'll find out. I'll briefly discuss our opportunities to share with others how God has comforted and forgiven us. There is a personal Spiritual Assessment at the end of the book. This fifteen page assessment is for the reader to examine themselves. To guide them as to what areas of their lives that needs attention. God is waiting!
Don't Be A Foolish Virgin!
Confessions of a Foolish VirginBy Sharon D. WattsAuthorHouse
Copyright © 2012 Sharon D. Watts
All right reserved.ISBN: 978-1-4772-5635-0Contents
Chapter 1 - Unqualified Love................................................1* Expression Recess-Seasons of Life.........................................19Chapter 2 - Off ending God? Who me?.........................................20* Expression Recess-Bondage to Deliverance..................................49Chapter 3 - Ask, Accept, Extend Forgiveness.................................50* Expression Recess-Forgiven and Redeemed...................................58Chapter 4 - A Clogged Trek..................................................59* Expression Recess-Adorn Yourself..........................................70Chapter 5 - Obedience to God................................................71* Expression Recess-God Will Help...........................................79Chapter 6 - Special Needs Children..........................................80* Expression Recess-Sun Rise Sun Set........................................85Chapter 7 - Developing a Personal Relationship with God.....................86Chapter 8 - Sharing Your Experience.........................................93* Expression Recess-Let It Rain.............................................95Personal Reflection - Self-Assessment Questionnaire.........................96
Chapter One
Unqualified Love
Flying over North Florida looking down at the landscapes and trees, my eyes caught a lake in the shape of a heart. I knew at that moment God was confirming in my spirit that he loved me.
While sitting on the beach, I looked up and saw the white clouds hovering over the ocean. My eyes tuned into a clear blue opening between the clouds. I tuned in a little more. In the clearing was the shape of a heart and again I felt the affirmation of God telling me that he loved me.
I fell in love with a smart, handsome guy (not pictured). I'll call him Thaddeus, which means heart. Once again, God was telling me that he loved me. God proved his love to me over and over again as my love for this witty, charming man grew stronger and stronger. Stay tuned....... God was telling me that he loved me.
Prior to these three symbols of love; my heart seemed deprived of the love of family and friends. I appeared to be giving more than what I was receiving. For years I was held on this high pedestal of honor and praise. All of the praise and honor was tearing me up on the inside. How can such recognition feel so negative?
Living as a middle-aged single woman, no children, and no special someone, this lifestyle was getting old. I had a good job and I had worked my way up the corporate ladder. The job I held required a lot of travel. Although I was on the road most of the time, I was still looked up to as the go-to-person. Yes, I loved the planning of family events, giving of my time and money, but over a period of years I was getting lonely and wanted someone or something to call my own. I started to pull back! Little by little, I refrained from doing what everyone expected of me. I kept telling myself, "it's now time for me to pursue my dreams."
The Bible tells us that after we have done the "will" of God all these things will be added unto us. "But seek (aim at and strive after) first of all His kingdom and His righteousness (His way of doing and being right), and then all these things taken together will be given you besides." Matthew 6:33 AMP
I was raised in the church. I held several positions, (secretary, choir president, Sunday school teacher, youth group, minister, choir director and more). I loved my neighbor as myself, attended church just about every Sunday, was a member of a Christian club, witnessed, and prayed for others and so on. All the above sounds like the "will" of God to me.
The one dream I thought sure to come true would be my wedding. My heart's desire was to finally get married and settle down.
My wedding dream.... imagine this!
The day has come for me to finally be a bride and not a bridesmaid. All the attendants have marched down the aisle. The audience is anxiously waiting for me, the bride, to make my grand entrance. I can see my fiancé' peaking around the guests as they are standing with expectation!
I am making my way in slowly; trying to pull myself together. I am still focusing on the things that went wrong in preparing for this most awesome day, but glad this special moment has finally come. My father looks into my eyes and tells me to relax, everything will be alright. He is really excited that his youngest daughter is finally getting married. He too had been waiting for this day.
I finally reached the front of the church. My groom is looking with sparkles in his eyes. He can't really see how beautiful I am because of the veil covering my face.
Now I am at the altar face-to-face with my groom. My father releases me and takes a seat next to my mom.
Fast forward ... after the songs, vows, exchanging of the rings, The Lord's Prayer, lighting of the unity candle and communion, it's now time to salute the bride. My groom, oops husband now, pulls the veil from over my face. Now he can see how beautiful I am. He gazes at me and approaches me with tears in his eyes. He kindly and gently touches my lips with his. There is relief written on our faces, aaaaah it's finally over. The veil has finally been lifted, we are now husband and wife, we are one. He whispers in my ear, "tonight I will go beyond another veil," I am really blushing now!
All of a sudden I imagined God questioning me. "Do you really know how to love me?" Do you really know how to love a husband?" How is your relationship with me?" "How is your relationship with your family and friends? Do you understand how to love unconditionally like I do? Where have you been? I have missed you!" In my mind, I envision God saying, "I'll talk with you more ... a little later."
Ok, back to my dream, the wedding dream. Well, the wedding dream is ok, but at this point in my life, a small private ceremony will do. There are more important things to consider then spending a large sum of money on a wedding, but that's a different story.
Over the past few years I have learned so much about God's unconditional love. Due to various reasons I felt that I was unqualified to be loved by God, family, friends and that special someone. Getting beyond the veil to enter into the presence of God has been a tedious journey for me. Obstacles have come during the process of trying to get beyond the veil to God.
Just like a bride preparing for her wedding day: six months to a year of preparation, the bride chooses her gown, a place for the ceremony and reception, bridesmaids, flower girls, wedding rings, caterer and much more. There is also preparation in developing that personal relationship with God, that special someone, and family and friends.
There are several things in our lives that may hinder us from going beyond the veil: disobedience, self will, confusion, stubbornness, etc. When we're not beyond the spiritual veil we worry about life's everyday problems. We worry about the future. We lose sleep at night because our minds are just wondering, wondering and wondering. We are wondering what, when, where, how and why. We lose our focus on God. We must take the appropriate steps to go beyond the veil to reach God. Believe me, it's better for you to make the move towards God, than for God to move towards you. You'll understand what I mean soon enough....