Manneys Big Show

San Luis Obispo, CA 1967

It was in his 20's Manney had his date with degradation. A well proportioned American male, he bore a strong resemblance to a younger Charley Sheen.

This day was designated for cruising on his, New Harley Motorcycle. And in his biker leathers, who knew what sassy lady he'd attract. Pulling out of traffic around noon, he parked at a local fast food joint.

At an outdoor table sat 3 comely girls — looking to be in their early 20's. And each was Manneys type. Blonde, brunette & female. Parked across the lot directly in their line of vision, he attached his helmet to the bike noticing they regarded him with great interest.

Proud as the 'Cock of the Walk,' ooouu - just look at him strut his stuff!

It was unfortunate in his crossing the lot, that he didn't see the slick oil patch on the pavement. His right boot slid like a rocket on it, pitching him back and off his feet.

When he impacted the hard ground, the wind knocked out of him, he saw a blinding, white light. He lay motionless for minutes. When his vision cleared, he saw the 3 girls talking to one another and looking everywhere but at him.

They conversed seriously, as if he wasn't laying 7 ft. in front of their table. As tho he didn't crash like a 747 missing the landing strip. One of the girls was watching a bird through her opera glasses which she shared with the others.

A blonde in the middle munched on her fries happily. Frozen in pain Manney lay on his back looking up at the sky.

The face of a large, black dog suddenly looked down at him. Panting, the K-9 sniffed his face & torso-determining he was not dead. Then tail wagging, the retriever pranced back to his owner. In the background, a big, shiney Harley Davidson stood alone bearing mute witness to the machismo-of the American male.

Ermas Confrontation

Rhinebeck, New York 1938

Before she passed away in her 80's, Erma related the following childhood experience which she found ridiculously funny.

It was a frosty, gray day as 10 year old Erma clutched her books and rambled along to the one room school house.

"Hello Mr. Frog!" she yelled as she passed the Old Mill Pond. She greeted a group of crows on the way, and stopped to hug a fat, tabby cat. As she trudged happily along, nothing could have prepared her 'That she had a date with emotional damage.'

At the school the teacher was instructing upon the proper use of grammar. He explained at length that Erma had no idea how to use grammar, sentences and adjectives. He expounded on her hopeless English at her present age. The little Italian girl hung her head, tears welling in dark, despondent eyes.

Each description of her ignorance was like a barb in her heart. The humiliation went on and on. She was hurt and angry. 'He is humiliating me,' she thought helplessly.

She had to stop the humiliation. She stood up looking daggers at this man:

"Now see here," she exploded. "Are you trying to huumm-a-late me?!!"

Marshmallow

San Mateo County, CA 1968

It was a hot, suffocating day as the Pontiac cruised along the roadway. Four sales reps and a supervisor were enroute home after a long afternoon of working six blocks door to door.

"Theres a plaza over there," Chris called out from the backseat. "Lets pull over and get some soda." The supervisor approved and pulled up to a mini mart.

The girls returned with a six pack of cola and a bag of colored, miniature marshmallows.

"Gee, didn't you buy chips?" Sharmane, the super asked.

"Ohhh," Judy said. The super looked confused.

Back on the freeway, the reps in the rear divided marshmallows. They thought it would be great fun to pelt traffic in the next lane, but agreed that Sharmane wouldn't approve.

With great joy the girls were just tossing left and right at the passing cars. Lucy, a rep in an end seat position tossed a marshmallow, but it rebounded off the window frame-and landed in the lap of Sharmane's sun dress. Intent on driving, the lady didn't see it.

The rep in the front, passenger seat dove into the driver's lap, and began digging thru the folds of the dress. Sharmane blushed crimson:

"What are you doing?!!!"

Her legs locked tight and she yelled: "Stop it--stop this!!!"

The rep caught up with the moment and searching for the marshmallow, shouted out:

"Open your legs and I'll get it!!"

The Pontiac weaved erratically, down the lane, with a shocked supervisor yelling and screeching.

Finally, with a desperate dig, the rep popped a little green marshmallow out of the lap, and laughing, shot it out the driver's window at a passing Volkswagen.

Sheba and Doe Doe

Millbrae, CA 1960

Sheba, a beautiful Nicole Kidman look-a-like, was very popular and always held an open invitation to social groups. She'd race around town in her baby blue Fiat, sports car, always happy, always welcome.

And always and everywhere with her, 'The loyal companion'--her dog, a boxer named Doe Doe. This one afternoon she dropped over to her sister-in-laws home where six friends had gathered. There was a circle of chairs in the living area for an active conversation group.

She sat next to her 14 year old niece, Tilda. Happily conversing, the niece asked where Doe Doe had gone? Sheba looked around but didn't see him and deduced he was just 'exploring and sniffing around.'

After a half hour Doe Doe came proudly up the stairwell-and the lower second floor. Just like a show dog of the grand, first award, he pranced his way to the middle of the group.

Head held high, he displayed his treasure in his mouth, then dropped the object in the center of the circle. A woman gasped, another looked down, hands over eyes. The niece tried to focus on what he brought, but she broke her glasses the day before. Tilda leaned toward Sheba and remarked: "Look . ... A Jelly Roll." Ponting to the white object from DoeDoes mouth.

Her aunt shot a look of surprised confusion: "Do you have a paper towel," Sheba managed to blurt. The niece grabbed a box of tissues.

"Wheres the garbage?", the aunt croaked.

"Under the kitchen sink," Tilda replied.

Sprightly the dog lady jumped up and...