Using real-life examples and anecdotes, this self-improvement handbook provides a guide for helping you find your true inner self and recognizing your true potential. Have you lost yourself in the day-to-day grind? In today's hectic and self-serving society, it's easy to do. It's difficult to gain a grasp on how to best understand who you really are and how to find yourself. In A Journey from Within, author Dr. Ram P. Ramcharran presents a guide to finding and discovering your inner self and identifying your true life objectives and desires. Using real-life examples from regular people, A Journey from Within helps you find ways to best learn about you and how to be a better person. Ramcharran defines "self" and the nature of human behavior and provides advice for how to: become more aware; discover your true being; find your inner courage; reflect and turn negatives to positive; fight your fears. In this self-improvement handbook, Ramcharran provides a guide to show you how to break the limitations of your mind, discover you, and build the framework needed to achieve your goals. The self becomes a symbol for life and you must live it, enjoy it, make it active, and discover it.
A Journey from Within
Ways to Understand the SelfBy Ram P. RamcharraniUniverse, Inc.
Copyright © 2011 Dr. Ram P. Ramcharran
All right reserved.ISBN: 978-1-4620-2515-2Contents
Acknowledgements........................................................................ixForeword................................................................................xiIntroduction............................................................................xiiiChapter 1 Background of the Author......................................................1Chapter 2 What Forms Your Belief System?................................................7Chapter 3 What You Believe Is More Important Than Just Believing........................13Chapter 4 Elements that Lead to Self-discovery and Awareness............................15Chapter 5 Understanding Your Personality and Knowing Your Behaviors.....................25Chapter 6 Subcategories of Personalities................................................33Chapter 7 Discover and Understand Your Awareness........................................35Chapter 8 Defining Fears................................................................38Chapter 9 Why Do You Avoid Fear?........................................................47Chapter 10 Why Do You Refuse to Accept Things You Cannot Control?.......................50Chapter 11 What Is the Self?............................................................52Chapter 12 The Truth about the Self.....................................................54Chapter 13 Questions That Help You Discover the Self....................................60Chapter 14 Tools to Learn to Help Identify the Self.....................................64Chapter 15 Goal Setting.................................................................69Chapter 16 Where Are You Now? Where Do You Want to Go or End Up?........................71Chapter 17 Systems, Processes, and Structure............................................77Chapter 18 Family Responsibilities......................................................80Chapter 19 Reflections..................................................................85Chapter 20 Hierarchy of Life............................................................87Chapter 21 Steps to Help You Discover and Understand the Self...........................91Chapter 22 Steps to Help You Make Improvement to the Self...............................95Epilogue................................................................................99
Chapter One
Background of the Author
The Change That Made Me the Person I Am Today
Be the change you want to see —Mohandas K. Gandhi
It was 6:00 p.m. in the evening on September 13, 2000. I was driving to the hospital after executing the most difficult thing up to that point in my short, and for the most part, happy spiritual life. I was returning from a 62-mile one-way journey after filing divorce papers against my former spouse.
I felt homeless and without any possessions because of the messy break up. I had been thrown out of my own house after working hard for many years to earn it. In a matter of a few moments, it was taken away from me. Until that moment, I thought I had been experiencing the worst days of my life. I felt empty, hopeless, useless, depressed, anxious, worthless, afraid, and powerless.
After filing my divorce documents, I drove to see my beloved father who was in the hospital for the fifth time that year. Dad was very ill. He had been fighting a severe virus for over 3 months. He had undergone two open-heart surgeries in ten years and a couple of other procedures to clean up his arteries. This was not a good thing at all. However, even with all those medical problems, his outlook on life was truly zestful—always!
I had spoken with Dad at the hospital the previous evening. He had said to me, "Son not to worry. You will get through the pain you are feeling and you will get past this situation in your life." He said, "This too shall pass, son." These were his ever-familiar words that I believed sincerely because no matter what, he always made me feel better about difficult situations. He always had a way with words that made people feel secure, special, loved, and appreciated. He assured me that life would always be okay.
On my way back to see him, I was traveling with his sister, my Aunt Savie, who was visiting from Canada. She was with me to offer some emotional support during my time of stress and difficulty. I was leaning on her and venting my frustrations about my divorce proceedings and this highly emotional time in my life. I did not believe anything could get worse, but it did.
As I was driving to the hospital, I missed the exit even though I had driven the route to and from the hospital hundreds of times. I had to alter my plan to visit earlier in the day. I had told dad that after finishing at the courthouse I would visit. He had said, "Don't worry. Finish what you have to do and then come see me later in the evening." He said this while trying to smile despite his pain.
With his support and guidance, I was able to make it through a difficult decision in my life. I had decided to do what I felt would be best for my life and get out of a destructive and failing marriage. He had said, "Do what you need to do and the rest will fall into place." This was a very difficult decision to make, especially with the social stigma associated with divorce in our community.
I missed the exit to the hospital because of the rush hour traffic congestion. I was not able to make a U-turn, so I decided to take another way that turned into a traffic nightmare. What should have been a ten- minute delay became a forty-five-minute detour. During the time in my car, I was joking and chatting with my Aunt Savie. We were reminiscing about our family vacation from the previous year when the entire family had visited Guyana, where I was born. It was my first trip back in over twenty-five years. We were talking about Dad's relationship with his own father. Things had been different when he was a young man. At this stage of life, our relationship was better than his had been with my grandfather, which made me feel great at that particular moment.
When we got to the hospital, Savie and I were still laughing and joking as we got off the elevator on Dad's floor. As I was passing by, I could feel all eyes on me. At first, I thought people were staring at us because we were laughing so much and making too much noise. As I went past the nursing station, I noticed the closed door to Dad's room. This was unusual because he never closed the door to his room. I pushed the door open. I saw my mom crying hysterically and noticed that my cousin was holding her trying to calm her down.
My worst fear hit me square in my face. My father had passed before I got there. It was just two months before his fifty-second birthday. My hero and best friend was gone. At that moment, I could see my life was never going to be the same ever again. I felt fear, pain, uncertainty, hopelessness, and anger. The thought that it was a dream and not happening, crossed my mind in a split second.
I was facing my lifelong fear—death! I always avoided death and funerals, but now there was no place for me to run. I felt trapped! The one person in my life that told me how he always felt whether it was good, bad, or indifferent was not going to be there anymore to be my best friend and father. The thought of being fatherless was agonizing and extremely painful....