Kink Is: An Anthology of Surprisingly Relatable True Stories about Sex, Power, and Joy

Foreword by Margaret Cho

In this groundbreaking anthology, kinky people from around the world reveal in intimate detail their true stories of embracing the non-traditional practices that have informed or defined their identities, sexualities, relationships, connections, and communities. Filled with first-person narratives and stunning photographs, Kink Is captures the universal presence of kink across cultures, private lives, and public events. In these stories -- as vulnerably honest as they are bravely bold -- real people share what motivates and animates their desires to experience human-to-human connection in novel ways, most often in the pursuit of increased emotional freedom, physical autonomy, individual power, and mind-altering joy. Featured here are activists, rebels, and professionals alike: Readers will meet a teacher, a technology guru, a priest, a political prisoner, a therapist, an astrophysicist, and a grandmother, among many others across all walks of life. These people come to Kink Is from everywhere, whether living their authentic lives in big cities, tidy subdivisions, or rural outposts. In the end, Kink Is uncovers how common life on the sexual frontier actually is, making this book surprisingly relatable -- even for people who think they are not kinky.

Race Bannon has been an organizer, writer, publisher, educator, commentator, leader, speaker, and activist in the LGBTQ, leather/kink, polyamory, and HIV/STI prevention realms since 1973. He is an author, widely published writer, active speaker, community organizer and project leader, and has received numerous national and local awards. He's also a regular cast member of the online series, On Guard Cigar Salon. You can find links to Race's writings and projects on his social media profiles which exist on all major platforms.

Jörg Fockele is an award-winning filmmaker, producer and TV director with a career spanning 30 years. He has written and/or directed 5 feature documentaries, 10+ short films, and numerous music videos and PSAs. His television credits include Bravo's Queer Eye, ABC 's Wife Swap, MTV's Savage U, and AMC's Small Town Security.

Silke Niggemeier (Lola De Milo) is a systemic family therapist (IGST), systemic sex therapist (IFSEX, IGST) NLP coach (DVNLP), mediator, BDSM activist, educator and multimedia artist, long-standing member on the board of the oldest registered association for kinksters in Germany/Europe (SMart-Rhein-Ruhr e.V.) and board member of the German Society for Social Scientific Sexual Research (DGSS) 30+ years of kink experience, public speaking, event organizing and her general interest in how humans function and love, brought her to Kink Is. Silke Niggemeier coined the terms Consensual Emotional Voyeurism (CEV) and Emotional Voyeurism (EV) and published on this subject internationally.

Adam Ouderkirk has been an organizer and activist in the LGBTQ and HIV/STI service communities since 1981, expanding access to competent medical care and disease prevention, working toward freedom, equality, and sexual expression for all. In twenty years working in HIV care, he developed 30 new care and treatment sites, from initial research and design, through acquiring public funding, to staffing and program oversight. Adam's 40 years of design and program development experience -- with the occasional dip into drag performance -- has brought creativity and know-how to his involvement with non-profit filmmaking, and an ongoing devotion to alternative explorations.

Beatrice Stonebanks is an accomplished AI Business Strategist specializing in revenue generation. Renowned for her gender-nonconforming online global community, Boardroom Dominatrix, Beatrice expertly navigates and scales both corporate and kink-adjacent domains. She is a five-time founder, an award-winning speaker, author, and community outreach leader. She develops, mentors, and launches start-up cohorts on an international scale. In 2024, she was inducted into the prestigious Society of Janus Hall of Fame.