Still Learning Lessons Even After Forty Still Learning Lessons Even After Forty

Still Learning Lessons Even After Forty

By Trudi M. Wray

AuthorHouse

Copyright © 2010 Trudi M. Wray
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4520-3189-7

Chapter One

Father

My dear father, you introduced me to the
Book of Proverbs; these words gave me the
gift of meaning—to live by, to accept lessons,
to accept courage to change things, and to
accept the growth and wisdom from you.
Thank you for your guidance and for always
being there and loving me so.
I love you so much.
Your loving daughter,
Trudi


Words

What I have learned is that words are
bonding. They define and shape who you
are. Your word is all you have, which means
you are only as good as your word.


Pride

The lesson I've learned is that authentic love
has no room for pride. Pride is a luxury you
cannot afford if you are in love.


Trust

It is amazing where you find your lessons if
you are open to receiving them. I heard this
lesson on the radio, and I thought, what a
great way to describe trust: Trust is like a
mirror; once it is broken, you never look at
it the same way again.


Truth and Honesty

The lesson I have learned about truth and
honesty is from a spiritual perspective. Some
people think that if they speak with honesty
and truth, that's acceptable. Sometime
honesty and truth without compassion can
be brutal, and that is abusive. In addition,
it can come off as self-righteous. When you
are dealing with someone who is devoted
to their truth or beliefs, they may have a
sincere but overly enthusiastic desire to share
the word, and this can cause a resistance.
When you are called to share the word, I
believe you are not responsible for someone's
acceptance or rejection of the word. It is not
your job to convict someone of sin. I believe
that's the Holy Spirit's responsibility, and I
also believe that's the honest and true answer
you should give someone.


Fear

I learned a lesson that came from one of
my pastor's sermons. He said fear can be
debilitating to the spirit. As a single parent,
I know this firsthand. When trying to
do everything and make it look like it's
working with little effort, you realize that
fear is always there, ready to leave you in
a state of confusion and depression. It can
leave you feeling stranded as you try to
figure out how to fit everything together.
Fear can cause stress. What I learned to do,
after hearing how fear can debilitate you,
is to replace that fear with perseverance, to
live and enjoy life with a purpose, to have
no regrets and no fear, and to remember
the slogan from the Marines, "semper fe,"
which means "always faithful."


Hurt People

The lesson I've learned about people who are
hurting and have never healed their wounds
is that their attitude is to get to you before
you get to them. This is because they get
lost in their own drama and then believe
they are healed—but, in reality, they never
sat still long enough to heal. They create an
environment that causes their hurt to then
hurt other people, and that's a recipe for a
dysfunctional and destructive relationship.


I love you means

The lesson I learned about "I love you"
is that people say it too much. They say
it because they have a need to be loved.
Sometime it just becomes words. What I've
learned about the words "I love you" is that
love has a one-way flow, going from you and
out of you. You give it because it makes you
feel good to give it. Also, when you give it,
it makes you strong. If it comes back, that's
extra, a bonus; you shouldn't need to receive
it. The true strength is in the giving of it.


Friendship

The lesson I have learned about friendship
is that when you have the privilege of a
friendship, it is the value of worth one
places on that friendship that determines
the longevity of that friendship.


Defeat

The lesson I have learned about defeat is that
it does not come from anyone except you. It
occurs from the inside, not the outside. It
the power of choices and the attitudes you
have within you that defeat you.


Dreams

The lesson I've learned about dreams is that
they inspire you to achieve anything you
want to obtain in life. Then, the beauty of
your dreams becomes a thought that then
lines up with your goals. After that what you
think about becomes the soul of your energy,
that flows into your reality. So, in essence,
you don't do anything worth doing unless
you dream.


Doubts in a relationship

The lesson I've learned about doubt in a
relationship has to do with someone making
self-deprecating comments. For example,
"You can have any person you want, why
me?" Or, "I am not good enough for you,"
or, "You deserve someone much better than
me, or, "I don't know how I got you." Believe
them, because in this type of relationship,
there can be fallacies, false pride, and low
self-esteem. That is something you cannot
change or fix in anyone. The best decision
you can make is to remove yourself, because
this type of relationship will only cause you
humiliation and heartache. If they do not
have self-love and a sense of self-worth, they
cannot have self-love and self-worth for you.


Clarity

The lesson I've learned about clarity is that
it allows you to see people as they are. It
strengthens your integrity and character to
stand in confidence on your convictions and
to share your compassion.


Purpose

What I've learned about purpose is that
it is a work in progress. It motivates you,
it keeps you determined, it constantly
develops who you are as a person. It is the
power that motivates the priorities you set
for yourself.


Counsel

One of the lessons I've learned about
counsel is from a spiritual perspective. I've
learned there are individuals who believe
in God but are not people of God. When
I was taking my walk to Christ, I traveled
to many different places of fellowship,
until I found my pastor. What I've learned
it that you can easily be misled in the
wrong circles. Therefore, if the leaders in
your place of fellowship are not giving you
strength, nourishment and, success with
understanding the word, then that may not
be the place for you. I believe fellowship is
people coming together to celebrate, and
the church is what you always carry inside
of you.


Blame

The lesson I've learned about blame is
to simply own it. That's the only way to
overcome and improve who you are. Take
the responsibility; don't assign blame,
because you never learn from the mistake.


Promises

What I've learned about promises is that
they can be hasty, empty, full of excuses,
and full of vanity. The multitude of words
you express from your mouth—words that
influence hopes and dreams—can destroy
and diminish people, so don't promise what
you cannot deliver.


Family

The lesson...