This is a self-help book centered on a nonscientific approach to the various roles the mind and the brain play in our lives. The basis for the approach is the authors’ research and experience working with patients related to stress management. It is a common-sense text that deals with stress and mindfulness and offers a new way of looking at how we live our lives. In between each chapter, suggestions are included on how to be more present in the moment, more "mindful," which are designed to supplement the chapter material.
The Mind Brain Matrix
Reflections of a Human Being
By Kerry P. GillespieBalboa Press
Copyright © 2017 Kerry P. Gillespie, MS.
All rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-5043-8503-9Contents
Acknowledgments, vii,
Author's Note, ix,
Introduction, xi,
Chapter 1 The Mind*Brain Matrix, 1,
Chapter 2 Our Goals and a GPS, 9,
Chapter 3 To Your Brain, You Are the Center of the Universe, 14,
Chapter 4 Life Is Isokinetic, 18,
Chapter 5 Relationships, 22,
Chapter 6 Everything Is Relative!, 27,
Chapter 7 Gratitude and Blessings, 30,
Chapter 8 Anger Management Is an Oxymoron, 34,
Chapter 9 Smoking Cessation and Weight Loss, 37,
Chapter 10 Rewrite the Script of Your Life, 44,
Chapter 11 What Is Hard in Life?, 49,
Chapter 12 The Meaning of Life — Discovering Your Gifts and Using Them, 52,
Chapter 13 Why Fears and Superstition Hold Us Back, 56,
Chapter 14 Stress versus Distress, 61,
Chapter 15 Never Have Another Problem — Sounds Good, Right!, 64,
Chapter 16 Issues versus Problems, 68,
Chapter 17 You Are Talking — Your Brain Is Listening — Even If No One Else Is!, 71,
Chapter 18 Past Performance Is Not an Indicator of Future Results, 75,
Chapter 19 Navigating the Mind Field, 78,
Chapter 20 Why Do These Things Happen to Me?, 82,
Chapter 21 Why Exercise Makes Life Easier!, 85,
Chapter 22 The Happiness Formula (CA – S = H2): Conscious Awareness – Stress = Happiness (Squared), 89,
Chapter 23 What That High School History Test Should Have Taught Us, 92,
Chapter 24 I'm Bored!, 96,
Chapter 25 Post-Traumatic Stress (Disorder?), 101,
Chapter 26 Making Sense of It All, 106,
Suggested Reading List, 111,
POEMS,
1. The Garden, 6,
2. Life, 20,
3. The Face and the Stranger, 50,
4. Awakening, 59,
5. Making Our Way, 87,
6. In the Same Place for the First Time, 99,
7. The Beach, 108,
CHAPTER 1
The Mind*Brain Matrix
We imagine that our thought can be kept secret, but it cannot — it rapidly crystallizes into habit, and habit solidifies into circumstance.
— James Allen, As a Man Thinketh
Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy? The brain wants to be right. In fact, it has to be right at all costs, which often compromises your happiness. Your mind, on the other hand, just wants to be happy. And while both your brain and your mind are "all about me," the brain is the small m in me, and the mind is the large M in Me.
Now, the argument that scientists are likely to make is that when they open up the head, all they find is the brain. So where's the mind? The mind is like electricity. Electricity is energy that can't be seen, but you know it's there when you turn on a light. The mind is energy that can't be seen, but you know it's there when your focused awareness is present in the moment. The mind is undetectable yet distinct from the brain.
We're beginning with this concept because it's the starting point for all the other parts of The Mind*Brain Matrix. Most of us have grown up believing that what we're thinking at any given time is what we're supposed to be thinking. After all, it's our brain doing the thinking. On closer examination, however, we find that what pops into our heads appears to be quite random as our brain wanders.
The premise of The Mind*Brain Matrix is that there's a difference between the brain and the mind. An easy way to think about this difference is to equate your brain with a computer and your mind as the conductor that directs the brain to use the knowledge, memories, and experiences stored in your brain's computer. Your mind should always be in control. Would you let your home computer run your life? There may be a time in the future when computers will be able to (or even worse, want to) run your life, but for right now, you should be in charge. Computers are great at doing many things, but the beauty of being human is that we can reason with our heads and our hearts. The computer, although evolving, can only operate using the information programmed into it.
So let us look at how this programming works. You do something multiple times in order for the brain to learn an activity, whether it's tying your shoes, adding numbers, driving a car, or smoking a cigarette. The brain turns that activity into a behavior. Once it's a behavior, your brain promotes it to make your life easier and to help you survive in the world. Imagine if you had to learn everything you know all over again every single day.
Smoking cigarettes was included on the list because you can create unhealthy behaviors just as easily as good ones (sometimes more easily!). The brain isn't going to question the behaviors you perform; it's simply going to continue to follow those behaviors until the mind intervenes (or doesn't).
See, your mind is responsible for how and whether the content and behaviors stored in your brain are exercised. If you choose to keep the mind out of the process, the brain will operate independently. If you've learned only useful behaviors, you might be fine (as long as someone else's brain doesn't get in your way), but what if you learned an unhealthy behavior? If your mind doesn't do anything to modify that program, the brain will continue to run that program until it destroys you. The brain doesn't care. The brain isn't designed to care. Conversely, your mind is designed to care. The mind is where your judgment resides.
To simplify this interaction, let's use the example of a parent and a child. In this case, the parent is the mind, and the child is the brain. When you're a baby, you're fully dependent on your parents or guardians. As you grow, you still rely on them for guidance and support, but they're supplemented by teachers, coaches, and, to a lesser extent, peers and relatives. Hopefully, to an even lesser extent, you're also influenced by the media, but I can't leave them out (although we all might be better off if we did!).
Would you tell a two-year-old something that you know wouldn't be in the child's best interest? Of course not, because you know the child wouldn't question what you're telling him or her; they would just do it. Similarly, the brain doesn't question what you tell it to do. If the mind doesn't correct the situation, the activity will be reproduced until it becomes a behavior.
In your early years, most of what your mind and brain do are basic activities performed by your parents or guardians. These activities require little thought, mainly due to the fact that you have little knowledge or experience to draw from in making decisions. To this point, the brain of the child is getting its direction from the parents. It's for that reason that the parents need to take an active role in their child's life. If the adults around you are taking their responsibilities seriously, you'll get loving attention and be read to, and you'll get good nutrition, plenty of restful sleep, and a healthy supply of physical activity. All these positive experiences will begin to establish healthy habits, both mentally and physically. However, if the adults around you are negligent in their responsibilities, a two-year-old brat is likely.
If that two-year-old bratty kid just wants what it wants — no explanation needed and none given — chances are more likely than not that real fundamental development may stop. I know in psychology circles it's a bad word to talk about...
