CHAPTER 1
Adversity
I have always faced adversity, but it has brought something out of me, and made me a success. — J. C. Penney
I honor adversity as a gift to help me grow. — Alan Cohen
It was two days before the Houston Marathon. I came home one evening from the TV studio where I am a regular panelist on health matters. I was in a great mood. The show had gone well; my answers had been brief, informative, and entertaining. Once we had gone off the air, I'd felt a higher energy in the studio. This energy had lingered long after the bright lights had been dimmed. During the segment I had tried hard to do what Franklin D. Roosevelt said: "Be sincere; be brief; be seated." That advice had worked well.
As soon as I returned home, I spotted my dog, Sage, a huge, gentle, and energetic black Labrador. Sage has been blessed with an amazing attitude. This enables her to live a zestful life. In many ways she is one of my best teachers. From her body language I could tell she was ready for a walk.
Soon after we headed outdoors into the cool, dark night, Sage spotted a rabbit. Fortunately for the rabbit, Sage was on a leash. I had no choice but to pick up the pace a bit as she forcefully strained in the direction of the rabbit. Unfortunately, she gained momentum, and soon I was pulled over, losing my grip on the uneven, slippery snow beneath my running shoes.
In the slowest of slow motions, I saw myself fly through the air and land hard on my left hip and shoulder. It was a nightmare. I could hardly stand on my left leg — and a marathon was forty-eight hours away! I limped home with Sage walking next to me, woefully looking into my eyes as if to say, "Sorry about that, but I could not help it, because that is what dogs do."
Fast-forward to Houston a few days later, and I held the finisher's medal in my hand. I was still limping but had covered the 26.2 miles anyhow, guided by a heart-rate monitor and enduring excruciating pain and discomfort for close to four hours.
When I flew back to Canada, I reflected on what had happened. Adversity has the potential to teach us lessons when we remain open to learn them. In this case, I was reminded that when we set goals in life and prepare for the right moment, we may face sudden setbacks. We then get to decide whether we go ahead, push hard, and give it our best shot or drop out, even before the race has started.
Inspired by the J. C. Penney quote at the start of the chapter, I chose to do my best, even though I knew it wouldn't be my best result. I have learned that too many people will not start something unless it is perfect. By living their lives this way, they miss out on some great adventures, challenges, and opportunities.
Those who wait for life to be perfect before they move forward remind me of a great poem by Leonard Cohen:
Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering.
There is a crack in everything.
That is how the light gets in.
The story of my injured days before an important marathon is rather simple, but it makes the point of how life can be perfect one moment, like a plane flying smoothly, and then suddenly, we encounter unexpected turbulence. We are suddenly shaken in all directions, wondering if our bumpy ride will somehow become smooth again — or maybe not. All of us, sooner or later, will face the shock of sudden change. Fear knocks at our door. I am reminded of the quote "Fear knocked at the door. Faith answered and no one was there." The problem, though, is that far too often fear comes back and knocks again.
Things went from bad to worse after the marathon: the electronic health records in my medical clinic caused major troubles; my favorite fountain pen's nib got damaged; my four kids, one after the other, caught viral infections; my wife was in a bad mood, fighting her own obstacles; and bills were ballooning all at once. I felt I was under an attack with all these events adding up together and causing unpleasant, unexpected obstacles in my life. These were not just a bend in my road; they were bumps, bouncing me all over the place, one after another.
While facing these challenges, I was reminded of these words, which synchronistically showed up at just the right moment: "When life presents challenges and we are able to utilize them, we are wise." It has been stated that we profit from our pain when we advance from our adversity. I could truly understand what these words meant because of my personal experiences.
To utilize adversity is not easy. It requires a patient persistence. President Calvin Coolidge said, "Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent."
Various kinds of relentless adversities seem to strike us all at once, one problem after another. It seems like waves crashing repeatedly against rocks by the edge of the ocean. The writer C. S. Lewis said that "hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny." I am convinced from my experiences as a physician that hardships indeed prepare many of us for a destiny far bigger than we can imagine at our time of pain.
Scripture calls these hardships trials. The Bible goes on to even say, "Consider it all joy, knowing that the testing of one's faith delivers patience." (James 1:2 NKJV, emphasis mine) Most of us do not choose adversity as the avenue to joy! Instead, we tend to fear hardships and avoid them at all costs. We may even question the reasons for our hardships by asking, "Why me?" In a fit of anger we may even shout, "Life is not fair!"
Plenty of people have read Rabbi Harold Kushner's book When Bad Things Happen to Good People. I suspect many of those readers felt they had made a deal with God, believing that they would be protected from pressures as long as they obeyed the rules. But this is not how God operates. We all experience cares, difficulties, and troubles — life is impermanent, and it evolves constantly. At some point all of us get an invitation to view adversities as our best teachers. Nobody is immune. Surrendering to the fact that we are not in full control, we grow from adversities and move forward after painful experiences.
When we grow from adversity, we become wise. Pain should never be allowed to go to waste. As someone observed, "Progress without pain is not possible." We move forward when we allow adversity to deliver life's lessons; pain has the potential to make us more resilient; our level of insight, enlightenment, and awareness increase. Like trees buffeted by storms, our root system deepens when we face challenges, but only if we surrender and remain openhearted. It is when trees resist storms that their branches break.
One outstanding advantage of adversity, soaring far above the other...
