Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.

— Anais Nin, author 1903–1977

My House Is Your House

Welcome. This is my life. My life consists of my family and friends, being a doctor, comedy, multiple sclerosis, teaching, religion, computing, woodworking, writing , jogging, nookie, thinning hair, the Yankees , reading Spenser novels , and thinking about God.

These are all things that are parts of my life. They're things that came into my life, and I treasure all of them because they're what make my life unique. This is Vincent Macaluso's life. I do not live with any of them. They live with me.

It's my house. It is up to me to keep the things that I have control of in balance. I value my family beyond all else in this world. My wife is the axis of my existence. We are blessed with two beautiful children. The four of us work through life together. We are a close family, in a cozy house. This allows us to create a tremendous home.

I love laughing. I love it when I laugh so hard it hurts and I can't catch my breath. Sometimes I get lucky and I laugh so hard that I can't catch my breath, and I start to black out, and I fall down. Then, when I'm lying on the floor, I start to think about how funny it must have looked when I keeled over. For me, that's a win-win-win situation.

I like watching The Colbert Report because it makes me think about the things going on in the world around me. Dr. Colbert's character brings up the absurdity of a situation or creates absurdity when there is none just to be a nudge. He goes fast, and you have to look and read and listen and think all at the same time. Stephen Colbert is smart. He challenges us. He has hair that does not move.

On the topic of hair, mine started an exodus several years ago. I didn't worry about it because I realized that I was getting older and it was a natural part of life. But as it grew thinner, I saw some pictures of myself and thought I would look better with hair — at least for a few more years. I started medication to keep my hair, and it had been working pretty well to slow down the loss. Unfortunately, the numbers continue to dwindle despite the medication. The countless many are becoming the cherished few. Well, I did what I could, but if this is my lot, so be it. I know I could get hair transplants done, but my two children are approaching the launch pad for college, and I think the money would be better spent maximizing what's inside their heads instead of maximizing what's on top of mine. I think of the hair loss situation the same way I think about Joe Torre and the Yankees. They had a good time together, but once they no longer benefitted from being together, they parted ways.

Multiple sclerosis entered my life over twenty-seven years ago. At first I didn't know what was happening. It was like some unwanted houseguest had arrived. My life was going on as usual, but suddenly I started to have strange feelings. Tingling here, decreased sensation there. I had trouble concentrating. Learning wasn't as easy as it had always been. This flighty guest came and went with neither rhyme nor reason. At first, I didn't know its name, but after diagnosis, I found out what it really was — an unruly guest. Sometimes with unruly guests, guidelines have to be set down. I had to find out what MS was all about. I had to find out what I could do to keep it in control. I also had to realize that some things I did not have control over. I decided to forget about that part so I could focus on the things that I could control in dealing with this morbus non grata. It was a big house I was running. Just because I found a chink in the foundation, I was not going to let the rest of what I had built get torn down.

I found a nice neurologist who specialized in MS.

I learned as much as I could about MS.

I got on a therapy to slow down MS.

I let my neurologist know if something new came up so we could decide what intervention we should make — if any.

I kept my eyes and ears open for new therapies that were coming.

I did not fight MS.

I saw what the situation was, and I did what I could to continue to make my home beautiful.

I asked for help.

I had good people around me who helped me when I asked for help.

I had people around me who helped even when I did not ask for it.

Or know that I needed it.

I was lucky that I had been able to lay such a good foundation for my home so that it was rock solid and ready to withstand storms when they hit.

While MS initially appeared daunting and unwelcomed when it showed up at my door, it turned out to be a crucial guest in my life. It helped me realize that while it is my life, it is still just that.

    Life.

    In life, there are no certainties.
    There are joys.
    There are marriages.
    There are children.
    There are diseases.
    There are good people.
    There are deaths.
    There are challenges.
    There are jobs.
    There are careers.
    There are disappointments.
    There are successes.
    There is laughter.
    There are houses.
    There is your house.
    There is my house.

This book is written from both sides of the desk. The first half of most topics is written by me, Vincent Macaluso, MD, from a neurological point of view. In these sections, I'm writing to teach about the factual things in MS — what the disease is, how to treat it, and so on. The second half of most topics is written by me, Vincent Macaluso, a guy with a wife, two kids, a mortgage, a lawn mower that might or might not turn over...