As Real As I Get' is filled with unadulterated emotion. Many of the selections have a much harder edge than the selections in C.S. Morrow's first book, 'Doshie Mae'. Reader Beware!

AS REAL AS I GET

By C.S. MORROW

AuthorHouse

Copyright © 2009 C.S. MORROW
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4490-0236-7

Contents

When I Think of You.....................1Last Night..............................2Slow Hustle.............................3Bruno and His Paper.....................4But.....................................5Retreat.................................6Time....................................7Scars...................................8Go Running..............................10Bad Terms...............................11Confirmation............................12Relentless..............................13Impenetrable............................14Life....................................15Injury..................................16One Way Love............................17Disbelief...............................18Instant Autumn..........................2011 Days.................................21Hoping to Find..........................22Deep Kiss...............................23Left Hanging............................24Good Cry................................25Reflection..............................26Blue....................................27Murder on my Mind.......................28As Real as I Get........................29Terror..................................30Dave....................................31Charles.................................32Few Minutes More........................33Classified..............................34Yearning................................35After Dark..............................36Kisses and Lies.........................38People Watching.........................39New Name................................40All I Know..............................41ICU.....................................42Afterthought............................43Separated...............................44Snapshot................................45Cotton sheets...........................46Signs...................................47So Sad..................................48Casual..................................49Recognize...............................50Keep the Funk...........................51The. End................................52

Chapter One

When I Think of You The taste of your lips on mine, then to have them flowing over my skin Keeps me tossin' and turnin' all night The scent of you, like perfume on my sheets, compels me to draw these sheets close and take long, deep breaths of you Your arms engulfing me as I slumber is what I want most The remembrance of the passion of your gentle touch-I'm longing to feel you tonight The feeling that nothing will ever hurt me makes me want you to stay and never leave For you to say you love me and mean it That's all I really want

Last Night

Last night I needed someone to hold me Needed to be near someone You were that one But do not think that There was anything more to it I have not forgiven you I have not forgotten The good or the bad I can not go back to that I can not go back to you But every now and then I need someone to hold me Need someone near You were that one

Slow Hustle 15 years is a long time to be hustlin' but that's what I've been doing staying up all night, sleeping all day never punching anybody's clock white collar crime, blue collar crime but I've never been collared never spent a single day in lock up I've been lucky that way For so long, I wanted to live a "normal" life Get a real job, a 9-5 I tried so many times but the streets pay so much better So I couldn't stay away from it All that money, all those women With all the money I've made hustlin' life should be good, now that I'm serious about going legit My money should be stacked One thing about hustlin'-money comes fast ... you spend it even faster because you know you can always earn it back you never really think about life AFTER the game I'm realizing now how hard it is to make it bills are piling up I can't just walk in the mall on the day the new Jordans come out and pick up a few pair I have to wait I have a budget now I'm trying to stay straight trying to leave the game before my luck goes bad but this shit's so hard contrary to what people say, you cancan stop the hustle but why would anyone want to? Bruno and His Paper Every Sunday 'round noon, sometimes later I hear a ring at my door Bruno's come for his paper If I don't answer If I try to ignore He'll ring again, maybe knock He's not leavin' 'til I come to the door $2 is all he wants on Sunday The next day only 1 He don't accept I.O.U. s You gotta pay upfront Don't come with silver or copper Bruno, he don't like loose change He'll take it if that's all you got 'Cause after all, he IS a businessman Bruno will keep his end of the deal As long as you keep yours Get your money right Saturday night Come Sunday, expect him at your door But I'm so tired of listening to you talk every other word is 'but' I know I need to stop doing this BUT.......... I thought about doing that BUT................. you have an excuse for everything nothing's ever your fault you are to be blamed for nothing it's all out of your control poor you you're so full of it you want the World and everyone in it to bend to your will you expect all kinds of concessions and exceptions certain restrictions always apply with you I don't know what cloud your head has been stuck in but you need to peak out long enough to get a glimpse of the real world the one with REAL people who have REAL problems the one where everyone struggles to get whatever it is they have until you realize and accept that nothing is owed to you and you don't deserve anymore than the rest of us you'll be nothing more than an excuse maker, an action-faker when you ought to be an action-taker

Retreat Whatever happened to that glow in your eyes The one you used to get when you saw me Whatever happened to the smiles, the laughter, the hopefulness? They use you They hurt you So badly that you've chosen to retreat from the World and all its trappings-including me It was hard for me to open up-but I grew to trust you-so I did it I opened up, I gave you my heart Gave you all my love All I ever did was give I would have given more but you didn't want it You didn't want it because you don't want me anymore You shut down You shut down and shut me out I don't really understand why You offer explanations and apologies but they don't help the hurt And they won't heal my heart Time I want to get away Run Fly Fade away everyone's in my ear I can't get a word in everyone wants, everyone needs, everyone says inside my head stirs a symphony of 'what ifs', 'whys' and 'probablys' I'm not...