The book is about ridiculous and at the same time serious things of the former Soviet Union life. It would serve for better understanding the enigmatic "Russian soul" which is deep, complicated, easily wounded, very broad, and also for better understanding the Soviet and the Socialism realities, the Russian history by telling the cute Soviet born anecdotes intertwined in the narration. The book is completely different by its content and orientation from the recently published book of Ben Lewis Hammer & Tickle: A History of Communism Told Through Communists Jokes. The subject of the book - Russian people (all Russian-speaking people who lived in the former Soviet Union).The narration in the form of reasoning and recollections together with the anecdotes touch many different topics: a significance of the intelligent for the society, Russian mentality with its distinguishing features, charm and dignity of Russian women, men and women relations, psychological excursions in the intimate things, characterization of the Socialism, psychological and moral condition of living in the Soviet Union, the comparison of the USA and the USSR, relationships between Russians and foreigners, and the topics devoted to the Ukraine, Armenian jokes, great world game Soccer. The conclusion of the book narrates a short history of the Russia from 862 A.C. till our days. The book also contains the verses of outstanding poets from Russia and Ukraine) little known to American reader.

THE REMINISCENCES OF THE OLD INTELLIGENT

With Folklore and PoemsBy Vladimir G. Loos

AuthorHouse

Copyright © 2010 Vladimir G. Loos
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4490-6901-8

Contents

Introduction........................................ixWho is an Intelligent...............................1Russian Mentality...................................4Women...............................................15Men and women.......................................21Socialism and Communism.............................29Our Address is the Soviet Union.....................39Soviet Jews.........................................58Ussr and Usa........................................63Ukraine.............................................76The Russians and the Foreigners.....................82Soccer..............................................85Armenian Radio......................................92Conclusion..........................................94Vocabulary..........................................119Name Directory......................................124Literature..........................................133

Chapter One

WHO IS AN INTELLIGENT

For Russia this word means a lot. According to the high standards of Russian mentality, an intelligent is the person who is educated enough, polite, can be told by his empathy to other people, animals, by his positive habits to dress, to communicate, by his behavior in society; and for male intelligent - by his attitude toward women.

O.K.: The old intelligent was always a little bit drunk, clean shaven and knew from Bach to Feuerbach.

The contemporary intelligent is always a little bit shaven, drunk as a lord, and knows from barbecue to damn you.>

"Every family has its own black sheep," as the popular Russian proverb says.

<Pushkin, "the sun of the Russian poetry", perished in a duel protecting the honor of a woman.

Mayakovskiy, "the singer of the Socialist Revolution", has shot himself because of a woman.

Docent (the assumed last name) - the Assistant Professor of the University) used foul language addressing to a woman.>

The person who wants to become an intelligent not necessary has to descend from a good stock, to graduate Harvard or Moscow University. The next anecdote was told me by my father who was born in an ordinary family. He taught me to be polite, to learn, to kiss a woman's hand, to make way and place for a woman and older adult, so to be the real intelligent.

Gogol from Hegel, Hegel from Bebel, Bebel from Babel, Babel from a cable, cable from 'kobel', 'kobel' from a bitch.>

(kobel - a male-dog in the Russian language).

I think many parents would prefer their child to become an intelligent. At the same time I suppose that this is a hard task to raise an intelligent. Think and choose. The next anecdote is about the "purified" intelligent again.

Old woman is just saying: "The times have badly changed. There is no intelligent anymore."

After some silence one man tears himself away a newspaper, takes off glasses and replies:

"You make a mistake, grand-mother. There are as many intelligent as a trash. But there is a big shortage of the seats.">

"He is a good father, just as he is a good son. Personally, he walks straightly, resembling in this his forerunner Nietzsche. He is a man with a well-balanced and strongly personality. He is austere towards others and anything but indulgent where his own case is concerned; and, for all his severity, he displays that old-fashioned Austrian courtesy which is now threatened with extinction."

This is about great Freud from the book of his disciple Fritz Wittels.

And let us go back to Russia. One real Russian intelligent about the other real Russian intelligent: "I certify with all my heart that he was a person with an uncommon inner generosity, breeding and refinement in the best meaning of these words, with gentleness and tact, having at the same time an unusual sincerity and simplicity, sensitiveness and tenderness with a rare veracity." It was the words of great Ivan Alekseyevich Bunin about great Anton Pavlovich Chekhov.

So, the main reason of this book is not just to smile or to laugh.

Chapter Two

RUSSIAN MENTALITY

Russia has many outstanding poets: Pushkin, Lermontov, Nekrasov, Esenin. They were great because could feel the Russian soul. One more Russian poet, Tyutchev, is not so great in the people's memory but well known for every Russian intelligent. He wrote in 1866:

"You cannot seize the Russian soul. Just using your mind. You cannot seize the Russian soul Just using common measure. The Russia has her own pride She only can be trusted.

"Dad, look," rapturously exclaimed Son. "What a beauty! The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, the sky is blue."

"You are right, Sonny. But our Motherland is inside," father answered.>

This is true. Many Russians lived and live now being very poor and humiliated. But they are real patriots of their Motherland which treats them so badly. Napoleon and Hitler had an opportunity to learn this for a sure.

Before 1990 the communists seized all benefits, being secretly rich and very arrogant. After 1990 many of them remaining arrogant changed their social orientation, began to be newborn nabobs and religiously obedient. It was the turn on 180 degrees. Big money and trust in God valued in the civilized world were strictly prohibited for the communists.

Andropov began his activity as a General Secretary of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union in 1982 trying to increase a labor discipline. He issued a secret order: to stop on the streets during the day time the people who have to be at the working places and to convey them to the police. Police informed a human resources department of the facility where the person worked. Then the punishment would go: to decrease a salary, to denounce in a labor discipline violation.

That time anecdote.

Supervisor does not believe and keeps refusing. At last the woman resorts to the extreme measure and gets the whole thing off her chest: she wants to meet her lover.

"This is quite a different thing!" supervisor is becoming to be animated. "But no shopping, go straight to the bed.">

Many Russians have a strong sense of humor. Here is the next anecdote.

"Private Ivanov, what are you thinking about?" the sergeant-major asks.

"I am thinking that on this place will be built a Palace of Labor, and the soviet people would enjoy this new modern building," Ivanov answers.

"Good. And...