CHAPTER 1

The Positive-Thinking Woman

Our minds hold the power that shapes what we do in life.Whether our thoughts are positive or negative, we areshaped by what we think. James Allen says in his book AsYou Think, "We are literally what we think, our character being thecomplete sum of all our thoughts." What it all boils down to is one'sthoughts form what one is or what one becomes. Who is the positive-thinkingwoman? Is that you or someone you would like to be? Doyou find yourself thinking negatively and uttering negative comments?Do you know that there is a divine presence in your life that is alwayspresent? Was positive thinking nurtured in you from the beginning?Were you made to feel good about yourself?

When you come into this life, your mind is like a blank sheet ofpaper. It is truly up to parents and other meaningful individuals to writesomething on that blank sheet and to provide positive reinforcement. Itis up to them to prepare the child for the challenges of life and to fosterpositive thinking. When this is not done, life experiences can sometimesbring about counterproductive results. Now, of course, children don'talways heed the lessons parents teach them, but at least if they arepresented, the chances of those lessons kicking in at opportune timesare heightened. All children need nurturing by those significant peoplethat surround them on a daily basis. The importance of self-esteemshould be instilled. A child should be encouraged to reach for the starsand engaged in discussions about the talents that God has bestowedupon each person.

Hopefully, the adults that surround the child do not squash herdreams. It is important that a positive-thinking child matures andembraces this characteristic as an adult. In spite of these parentalinitiatives, some may acquire feelings of self-doubt that damage theirself-confidence and ability to succeed in the world. Of course, somehave not had parental or significant people encouragement. However,it is never too late to undergo transformation.

This book is written for black women, young and old, who areseriously seeking to think positively. If you are a young woman whowants to develop into a positive, strong, beautiful, and confident blackwoman, this book provides some practical steps that will help youreach your goals. I hope that the more mature black women who neveracquired these attributes or who have begun to doubt their magnificencewill find this book a helpful refresher. I also hope that it will be aninspiration to dispel any doubts you may have about yourself. It willhelp if you know that there is a God who promises to be with youthrough it all. You can transform your life. I want you to be able todevelop into that positive, confident, beautiful, and successful womanthat God intended you to be.

In this day and time, many of us face so many problems, challenges,and fears along with competition and jealousy. Whether you know itor not, we continue to live in a country where racial discriminationcontinues to exist. There are many doubts about the future. There areworries about the financial status of the country as well as the enormousamount of societal ills in the community and the world. However, wehave to remember that we are profoundly blessed, and we can keep apositive outlook on life. I am not suggesting that you deny the truthbecause you must acknowledge what is actually happening around you.Things are definitely going to go wrong. There will be certain forcesin life that you cannot control, such as social, political, and economicconditions. However, there are conditions that you can adjust to in life.Life is full of trials and tribulations, and you definitely have to deal withthem. Do not allow trouble to immobilize you and stop progress. Whenyou are a positive thinker, you can recreate what you want in life. Ifyou are not satisfied with your position in life and don't have a sense ofaccomplishment, then you must change the direction you have taken.This is positive thinking. No matter what happens, things will turn outalright. As a black woman, you have the ability to accomplish whateverit is you want to achieve. The mind is the key component to believingthat what seems impossible is indeed possible. You must expect thatthings will turn out alright. You will focus on the goal. A good exampleof this is found in the story of the Apostle Paul, who found immensestrength and courage in God.

He preached,

"I am more; in labours more abundant, in stripes above measure,in prisons more frequent, in deaths oft. Of the Jews five timesreceived I forty stripes save one. Thrice was I beaten with rods,once was I stoned, thrice I suffered shipwreck, a night and aday I have been in the deep, in journeyings often, in perils ofwaters, in perils of robbers, in perils by mine own countrymen,in perils by the heathen, in perils in the city, in perils in thewilderness, in perils in the sea, in perils among false brethren;In weariness and painfulness, in watchings often, in hunger andthirst, in fastings often, in cold and nakedness. Beside thosethings that are without, that which cometh upon me daily,the care of all the churches. Who is weak, and I am not weak?Who is offended, and I burn not? If I must needs glory, I willglory of the things which concern mine infirmities. I must boastabout myself, except about my weaknesses.... [God] said to me,`My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfectin weakness.' Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in myinfirmities, that the power of Christ may rest on me. ThereforeI take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, inpersecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak,then I am strong" (2 Corinthians 11:23–12:10, KJV).

Through all of the troubles Paul experienced, he let nothing stophim from his goal at hand, which was his ministry. Paul was a positivethinker, and he believed that he could achieve the goal that Christ calledhim to conquer. His task was not easy, but Paul truly believed he couldendure. Christ called him to preach the Gospel, and he did.

Paul encountered rejections and humiliating situations that wouldmake some people forget about what they were trying to achieve. LikePaul, many human beings have suffered adversities in life, but knowGod does not want you to be weak, passive, or ineffective. In spite ofhardships, like Paul, you can endure and will accomplish what you setout to do when you have faith. And remember: your strength comesfrom God.

Let us take a look at the journey of some black women who havesoared to great heights. Toni Morrison overcame divorce and otherobstacles to become a renowned writer who holds a Pulitzer Prize andthe Nobel Prize for Literature. Oprah Winfrey rose from poverty andtrouble in her formative years to become one of the most powerfulwomen in television, and she is very wealthy. Maya...