Life is a journey, and sometimes not an easy one. Growing up knowing some of the basic truths and unwritten rules would make the journey a little easier. This book can help. Written in a no-nonsense, "tell it like it is" way, here is the real deal about a number of things each of us encounter and experience on a daily basis. Herein lies the truth about life experiences that affect everyone. Written for anyone 12 and older, it is sure to make you stop and think about your life, your future, and everything you do from this point forward. A powerful book about the way things really are and how it all affects you as an individual. How it affects your life and the lives of those around you. A must-read for teens and young adults!

Twists and Turns

A Handbook On Life and LivingBy Lori Gayle Bailey

AuthorHouse

Copyright © 2009 Lori Gayle Bailey
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4389-5468-4

Contents

Introduction...........................................3Chapter I. Fair........................................7Chapter II. The Ripple Effect..........................11Chapter III. Balancing a Checkbook.....................17Chapter IV. Entitlement................................23Chapter V. Free........................................27Chapter VI. Paying Attention...........................31Chapter VII. Popular...................................35Chapter VIII. Looking Ahead............................39Chapter IX. Learn, Learn, Learn........................43Chapter X. Our Ju$tice $y$tem..........................47One Last Word..........................................59Final Thoughts.........................................61

Chapter One

Fair

What you do think of when you hear the word "fair"? Really think about this for a few minutes before you read any further.

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines the adjective "fair" as "marked by impartiality and honesty: free from self-interest, prejudice, or favoritism: free from favor toward either or any side."

The same word as a noun is defined as "a competitive exhibition usually with accompanying entertainment and amusements: an exhibition designed to acquaint prospective buyers or the general public with a product: an exposition that promotes the availability of services or opportunities."

As a child and possibly even until the day you read this, you at some time have complained, most likely to a parent, that something in life wasn't fair. "That's not fair!"

I am 100% sure that statement was true at the time you said it in the particular situation. It has been said by probably every child at some time in life and may still be spouted out of your mouth even today.

You must accept and know that life is not fair, nor will it ever be. As soon as you realize to the depths of your being that this is true, it makes everything easier.

When you expect circumstances to be fair, you just set yourself up for one disappointment after another, leaving you frustrated, unhappy, and many times despondent. This can lead to depression, health problems, and even criminal activity as a way to "get back at life" for treating you unfairly.

Trust me; these will not change the fact that life is not fair. It wasn't intended to be and it never will be. We must accept things as they are, and not assume or expect it to be fair. Not from our viewpoint, nor from that of anyone else.

There will always be those in this life that have less than you do, and there will always be those in this life that have more than you do. I'm not necessarily speaking of material possessions, though that is one of the first ways we as children start to notice and feel that life isn't fair. I'm also speaking of things like opportunity, work, treatment by other people, and even this country's justice system. I will now expand on these for you in order to give you some very real life examples in order to prove what I have just told you.

As a child growing up, you became aware that some of your friends and classmates drove better cars, had more expensive clothes, and lived in bigger houses than you. In today's world, many children are being raised by only one parent. Many are being raised by grandparents in the absence of one or both parents. These types of things become obvious to a child at a young age.

Some child you knew took dance lessons, played the violin, and was enrolled in cheerleading. Another child played football, baseball, and played in the school band.

Then there was the child that never was involved in any type of extracurricular activities, and who went home each day after school and did nothing but homework, chores and watching TV. Their weekends were nothing but staying home and playing or watching TV.

We don't know the reason behind any of the examples above. It could be the parents pushing the child to dance, play an instrument, or try to become a famous athlete. The child might actually exhibit greater-than-normal talent in these areas and really want to pursue these things. The parents could be so deathly afraid that their child will veer off into the world of drugs, gangs, etc. that they have vowed to never give them a spare moment to consider these options. The stay-at-home child could be unable to afford these activities, or could have parents that are so involved in their work that they can't devote the time and/or money to allow their child's participation in extracurricular activities.

However, what I know you were thinking while reading the above was that in some way "that isn't fair" to the child that is never involved in activities of any kind. And from the pure definition of the word when used as an adjective, I will have to agree. No, it isn't fair.

But it is the way it is, and neither you nor I can change it, no matter how unfair we may think it is. It just is and we must accept that fact.

It is not that hard to accept this concept when it involves other people. When the comparisons start involving you personally, humans have a bit more difficulty accepting the same concept and doing so easily.

Look at your life in relation to the lives of those around you. Life will always seem unfair in some way if we want to view it that way. What I am trying to impart to you is that people are not born into this world under even and equal circumstances, so there will never be an even playing field. Therefore, there should be no attempts to turn it into such, or to see it as such.

Now you just need to individualize that understanding down to the level of every aspect of your life, and you will have made a great step forward in terms of life and living it more fully.

You have the ability to change many things in your life and go anywhere and do anything that you can dream, with some advance planning and hard work and a good education. Just don't carry along that burden of the expectation of fairness in life.

It's a weight on your shoulders that you don't need and that will only impede your progress. It will also leave a very bitter taste in your mouth and one that will poison your soul.

The way I see it, "fair" is a noun and brings to mind the annual event in Dallas, Texas known as the "State Fair". Fair as an adjective should never be used to describe life.

In later chapters of this book, I can guarantee you that as you read some of the realities I present to you, that little voice in your head is going to be shouting out "That's not fair," as well it should. That is why I made this the first chapter in this book, so you would have a basis on which to truly understand the things I have chosen to write about. I know that it's all not fair. My goal is to teach you that fact, and the fact that it was never intended to be fair. It just is and one must accept that.

Chapter Two

The Ripple Effect

I'm sure that you, at some time in your life, have thrown a rock into a pond of water. If you have not, by some chance, stop reading now and go fill your bathtub or some large container with water, and find a small pebble, marble or rock. When the tub or container is full and the water is completely calm and resembles a sheet of glass, toss the object into the water. Watch the...