CHAPTER 1
OUR STORY
For those of you that are having trouble with your teenagers, we need to get something straight right off the bat. There is a mysterious phenomenon that takes place when families start experiencing behavioral problems with their teens. The parents automatically assume that they are the only ones this is happening to. On the flipside, there are a lot of families that just don't believe this could ever happen to them. I know that's what we thought. Nothing could be further from the truth. Millions of families are going through the same thing and many of them have it much worse than you or I do. I know that is hard for you to hear right now, but it's true.
As time goes on, you will come across people from all walks of life that are much worse off than you or me but up until now, we've all been totally absorbed in our own situation, that we haven't been able to look around to see how many of our own close neighbors or family are going through the same things.
I promise you that before your crisis settles down, you will say a multitude of times:
Just when you think you have it bad, someone like this comes along. I guess we can get through this after all.
I'll tell our story and then move forward to help you. I know you want to get right to the meat of the matter, the solutions and answers. Well, you can't find the answers until you're sure of what the right questions are. Make sense?
Be patient. There is a method to my madness.
Let me paint the picture for you. Let's say your teen is drinking very heavily at an early age, say thirteen or fourteen years old. It doesn't happen you say? Guess again. If your teen is becoming involved with drugs or alcohol, you will probably start seeing signs of it right about the end of seventh grade. Sound impossible? Sorry, but it's not only possible, but very likely that your teen will be exposed to alcohol at that age. The really scary thing is; if they are drinking or doing drugs, you may be shocked to find out they've been doing it right under your nose for some time. I'll get into the signals to look for later on. I wish I didn't know any of this. Life was much better before I did.
First off, not all teens are bad. In fact, the great majority of them are good kids and live a clean life. Teens today aren't a whole lot different than we were. They may be defiant, angry, confused, arrogant, disrespectful, or all of the above. My God, did I just describe the 60's? This is where you can laugh—seventies, eighties, or fifties for that matter.
There is, however, one major difference between then and now. Our kids are faced with a heck of a lot more exposure to alcohol, drugs, and gangs than we ever were. To tell you the truth, I would NOT want to be a teenager today. When I was a teenager in the late sixties, sure drugs were around. We had grass, alcohol, acid, LSD, cocaine, and many more. But, you kind of had to know where to go find them. When you did smoke grass, it wasn't like it is today. I mean, it was grass, that's all. Nowadays, they are cultivating it in different strengths. I mean they are actually color coding it by strength. All a kid has to do now is stand around by his locker and someone will come to him. It's amazing!
I mentioned earlier to imagine your teen drinking heavily at the age of thirteen or fourteen. In case you have any doubts that they do it, look at the charts below. These are the results of a study performed by the Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance System, a division of the Center for Disease Control (CDC). This is only one of the questions they asked nationwide. They asked teens if they have consumed alcohol before the age of thirteen other than just a few sips. The results are listed every two years from 1991 through 2011. As you can see, there's a gradual decrease. Interestingly, it is pretty evenly split between males and females. The percentages can be deceiving. There are still a lot of young people out there doing it.
Way back then, there was weed, alcohol, speed, LSD, heroin, and acid. This is some nasty stuff indeed. Today, when your teen buys that bag of weed, the odds are it will be laced with something with a little more kick to it such as PCP or Heroin. The scum that's out there selling it is determined to get your child hooked as fast as possible regardless of the risk to your child. Their attitude is simple. If he dies, oh well, I'll just find another one to sell to. While we're at it, let's not forget our new friends, Ecstasy and Crystal Meth. They target girls with Ecstasy because it gets them to lower their inhibitions. It makes it easier for the boys to get what they want.
The National Institute for Drug Abuse monitored marijuana use among teenagers and found the following.
Statistics and Trends
Monitoring the Future Study: Trends in Prevalence of Marijuana/Hashish for 8th-Graders, 10th-Graders, and 12th-Graders; 2012 (in percent)
As you can see, 8th graders are slowly increasing, but look at the 10th and 12th graders. According to this graph, the older they get, the more they use it. But the fact remains, Marijuana is penetrating the 8th grade age bracket more and more. Starting with alcohol and marijuana, you can see the progression. 38% of teens interviewed have had alcohol before they turned 13. Then in the nineties, we see that 8th graders have started using marijuana at an increasing rate. Then it declined until about 2007 when it started to increase again.
Most begin with alcohol. Make no mistake about it. Alcohol is not a drug. It is THE drug. The younger the child, the faster they get addicted to alcohol. So watch out! And please don't utter that ridiculous cliché "at least they're not doing drugs." Yes they are!! Alcohol is the biggest gateway drug out there. So, what comes next you ask? Usually marijuana. When alcohol just isn't enough, rest assured that one of their good friends will turn them on to weed or something else.
Most of this is pretty easy to get. Far too easy but it is what it is. There are dealers for everything now. Much of it is controlled by gangs or the mob. So just getting mixed up with a dealer is bad news. Adults are adults. They are legally old enough to make their own decisions and mistakes. There's not much you or I can do about that. To drug dealers, the adults are just a source of income. Adults have more money to spend. But children have ways to get the money too. Dealers selling to adults are bad enough and should be prosecuted and punished to the full extent of the law. But dealers who sell to kids are the worst. If you find one, notify the police. Look at it this way. When they sell this junk to your child, they can get addicted or even die. The dealer couldn't care less how it hurts them or you.
So why then should you feel bad about turning them in?
Dealers that sell to children are the worst and the punishment laws...
